Thursday is the opening of family-get-together season; a time of high stress for many, i.e., a time of battles, large and small.

This is also the time of year that the media trots out dozens of therapists, coaches, etc., to advise on how to handle family get-togethers.

But I think they miss the point.

Connecting for a better relationship isn’t the aim when Uncle Harry drinks too much and starts on his standard rant of what’s wrong with today’s society, etc., etc, etc.

What’s needed are hardcore negotiating skills.

And who better to share them in time for the start of family-get-together season than real hostage negotiators who handle potentially violent confrontations for a living?

I have often wondered, How might a hostage negotiator help the average American family get through Thanksgiving? (…)  Surely these are matters for professionals who’ve received months of intensive training in crisis intervention?

Perfect.

Read the article, practice on a like-minded friend between now and Thursday and you’ll have the skills to handle everything Uncle Harry, cousin Rebecca or anyone else might throw your way.

Flickr image credit: Tambako The Jaguar

Today is a friend’s birthday and he’s freaking out over it.

Jeff was born November 5, 1664.

Yup, today at 4:54 pm he will be exactly one-half century old.
(He didn’t appreciate the phrasing.)

I also reminded him that he’d never be as old as me.

Of course, the reason that few people realize just how ancient I really am is in my MAP:

I have a timeless view of myself.

My true wish for Jeff and all of you as you grow old (not up), is

May all your wrinkles be in your brain.

Happy future to all!

Flickr image credit: Dark Dwarf

I liked Halloween long before it became big business—about a third of what is spent on the highest spending holiday (no, not Christmas; Mother’s Day at $20+ billion).

That said, my Halloweens have shrunk since I left San Francisco for the small town I live in now.

What hasn’t changed is my penchant to write rhymes for the occasion—my contribution to the October 31^st fright factor.

So here are this year’s offerings; you can see previous efforts here and here.

Scary News
Halloween’s a spooky night
when people pay to engage in fright.
I’ve never understood that yearning
to scream at something seen on turning.
Witches, warlocks, the walking dead
or someone who has lost their head.
Tonight the scares come by ones and twos—
the rest of the year just read the news.

Black Friday on Halloween
Halloween comes but once a year
a night that’s filled with fun and fear.
It used to be for children small
‘til merchants fell beneath its thrall.
They, in turn, enthralled adults
who willingly spend to provide results.
2014 will prove a record,
with 7 plus billion dollars expected.

Flickr Image credit: WxMom

Halloween 2014

I liked Halloween long before it became big business—about a third of what is spent on the highest spending holiday (no, not Christmas; Mother’s Day at $20+ billion).

That said, my Halloweens have shrunk since I left San Francisco for the small town I live in now.

What hasn’t changed is my penchant to write rhymes for the occasion—my contribution to the October 31^st fright factor.

So here are this year’s offerings; you can see previous efforts here and here.

Scary News

Halloween’s a spooky night

when people pay to engage in fright.

I’ve never understood that yearning

to scream at something seen on turning

Witches, warlocks, the walking dead

or someone who has lost their head.

Tonight the scares come by ones and twos

The rest of the year just read the news.

Black Friday for Halloween

Halloween comes but once a year

a night that’s filled with fun and fear.

It used to be for children small

‘til merchants fell beneath its thrall.

They, in turn, enthralled adults

who willingly spend to provide results.

2014 will prove a record,

with more than 7 billion dollars expected.

Flickr Image credit: WxMom

Sometimes I’m just not in the mood to write. Like today; the start of Q4 and I’m still finishing stuff from Q2.

So rather than just not publishing today, I thought I’d share some social media funnies courtesy of my sister and the internet—they made me smile.

Enjoy!

We all work very hard, whether earning a living, studying in school, playing sports or any of the myriad of efforts that fill our lives.

This Labor Day I thought I’d share an attitude I work to keep foremost in my mind—no matter how difficult things are.

Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely
in a handsome, well preserved body, with a neat haircut and a nice smile,
but rather
to skid in sideways,
making as much noise as possible,
chocolate in one hand,
wine in the other,
adrenaline pumping,
body thoroughly used up,
totally worn out and screaming
“WOO HOO what a ride!”

 

Today marks a small, in the scheme of things, accomplishment for me.

It is my 3500^th post, counting both MAPping Company Success and Leadership Turn, which I wrote for B5 media.

The count isn’t perfect, since I freely admit that I fudged now and then using posts from here on Leadership Turn and vice

versa, reposted a few over the years and then there are the guest posts.

But the WordPress counter says 3500 and I’ll take it.

I am also giving myself the day off.

But just in case you do need some inspiration today, click over to the July Leadership Development Carnival; you can’t go wrong.

I hope you all enjoy my milestone as much as I plan to!

MAPping Company Success doesn’t publish on weekends, so I’m taking the liberty of sharing this unique commentary on motherhood.

Share it with every mom you know and I doubt you’ll find even one who doesn’t agree that the bear facts beat our human experience hands (paws) down.

Image credit: Unknown

Ease of replication will destroy your business.

Hat tip to KG Charles-Harris for sending this.

Image credit: Jeroom.Inc

I am frequently asked how to deal with arrogance, disrespect and other antisocial behavior.

Often, the people asking are looking for approaches that echo the classy insults post from 2009.

KG Charles-Harris recently provided a brilliant example of how to handle such comments, with class and amiable good will—although the recipient might not agree.

While I doubt that the following actually happened, that doesn’t change the intelligence and elegance behind the responses.

When Gandhi was studying law at the University College of London, there was a professor, whose last name was Peters, who felt animosity for Gandhi, and because Gandhi never lowered his head towards him, their “arguments” were very common.

One day, Mr. Peters was having lunch at the dining room of the University and Gandhi came along with his tray and sat next to the professor. The professor, in his arrogance, said, “Mr Gandhi: you do not understand… a pig and a bird do not sit together to eat,” to which Gandhi replies, “You do not worry professor, I’ll fly away ,” and he went and sat at another table.

Mr. Peters, green of rage, decides to take revenge on the next test, but Gandhi responds brilliantly to all questions. Then, Mr. Peters asked him the following question: “Mr Gandhi, if you are walking down the street and find a package, and within it there is a bag of wisdom and another bag with a lot of money; which one will you take?”

Without hesitating, Gandhi responded, “The one with the money, of course.”

Mr. Peters, smiling, said, “I, in your place, would have taken the wisdom, don’t you think?”

“Each one takes what one doesn’t have,” responded Gandhi indifferently.

Mr. Peters, already hysteric, writes on the exam sheet the word “idiot” and gives it to Gandhi. Gandhi takes the exam sheet and sits down.

A few minutes later, Gandhi goes to the professor and says, “Mr. Peters, you signed the sheet, but you did not give me the grade.”

The ‘trick’ is responding to the actual content, rather than the intent, and turning the put-downs back on the speaker.

A good lesson for us all.

Flickr image credit: Okinawa Soba

Every so often my philosophical side teams up with my silly side.

I try not to allow the two of them to dictate the day’s post, but today they won.

I have no idea where the sign is, but I would love to share dinner and a bottle of wine with whoever wrote it.