In an article focused on meetings and importance of being direct Tony Tjan, CEO and Managing Partner of The Cue Ball Group, says, “When we avoid conflict or try to skirt directness, it does a disservice to all involved, and often just plain wastes time.”
I’ve voiced similar thoughts about directness in posts about bad news and rumors (supported by some interesting CDC research).
It often seems that subtlety and so-called diplomacy is taking the place of direct, honest communications, which, especially in the workplace, is asking for trouble.
A lack of directness stems mainly from three very different sources.
Fear of confrontation: directness is often seen as a confrontational act that may create disagreement unlike subtlety and hints that can be misconstrued.
Confusion/lack of clarity: not having a good grasp on what you want to communicate makes it impossible to be direct.
Laziness: it is far easier to talk about, around, over and under the subject than it is to sort it out and plan how to best communicate it.
Another misconception is that being direct means being rude.
It doesn’t.
Rudeness is as much a function of presentation as it is of wording.
It’s simple to clean up wording; sanitizing non-verbal communications takes a bit more effort.
It means eliminating negative or demeaning body language (like sighs and eye-rolls) and focusing on displaying respect for those to whom you are speaking.
It may even require an adjustment to your MAP, but the pay-off is worth it.
Less confusion, less disagreement, less acrimony; increased trust and improved productivity and creativity are just a few of the benefits of clear, direct communications.
Customer loyalty is a top priority no matter what you are selling—especially in retail.
Just ask Tony Hsieh, whose focus on Zappos’ workforce created the platinum standard of customer service that yielded a storied (and envied) level of customer engagement and loyalty.
The most important component by far is customer engagement. “Retailers should ask themselves, ‘how do I create a partnership with the consumer?’ instead of pulling one over on them,” says Harvard Business School senior lecturer José Alvarez. Many customers see loyalty programs as a way of being ambushed by the retailer.
Many retailers see smartphones as a successful way of engaging customers—but are they?
I have to wonder if they are taking into account the real numbers.
48.5% of all smartphone handsets are Android, while Apple is at 32%, yet I constantly see product and service offers that require an iPhone.
Stop & Shop recently rolled out Scan It! Mobile, an app that turns a customer’s iPhone into a mobile scanner and checkout.
Gender-wise, smartphone use is nearly identical, 50.9% women 50.1% men, but age is a different story, with two out of three 25-34 year-olds having smartphones.
The median net worth of households headed by someone 65 or older is $170,494, 42 percent higher than in 1984, while the median net worth for younger-age households is $3,662, down 68 percent from a quarter century ago, according to an analysis by the Pew Research Center.
I’m a long way from being any kind of expert, but it seems to me that basing a loyalty/customer engagement model on smartphones, let alone iPhones, doesn’t make much sense when viewed through the lens of actual usage and related income stats.
December is a time when many people think about what they should have done, what they did and what they could do better. That said, here are some suggestions that may resonate with you.
Let’s start with George Will’s attitude, which is the not only the best, but the first and most important thing to remember about people, “It’s extraordinary how extraodinary the ordinary person is.”
According to Richard L. Evans, “Children will not remember you for the material things you provided, but for the feeling that you cherished them.”I say that is equally true for every person you will ever meet, so cherish everyone, until they prove unworthy (instead of the opposite).
Live by the words of Ralph Waldo Emerson, “Do not go where the path may lead, go instead where there is no path and leave a trail.”
And as you do so remember also the words of Proust, “The real voyage of discovery consists not in seeking new landscapes, but in having new eyes.”
Live by the proverb “A good listener is a silent flatterer.”
Follow the advice of Dee Hock, “Clean out a corner of your mind and creativity will instantly fill it.”
And above all embrace the words of Rumi, “Be a lamp, a lifeboat or a ladder.” Better yet, be all three—as needed.
Last week you got a glimpse of a few difficulties faced by the wealthy (‘rich’ is such a crude word and so open to interpretation, while ‘wealthy’ is less specific).
Today we’ll take a look at gifts for them and for us.
First off, I couldn’t find Neiman Marcus’ famous (infamous:) Holiday Gift Book, but I did find some great food items.
There are marvelous stocking stuffers from a fantasy store (includes links to products) ranging from a pair of Paul Morelli earrings at $37,000 or a Dolce & Gabbana hair comb for $545 to an affordable Pisces powder compact from Estée Lauder for just $70.
Hermès has something special for that evening butterfly who hates carrying a purse; it’s called Nausicaa (rose gold and diamonds) and sells for a paltry $578,000.
I’m always surprised at how affordable many of Tiffany’s business gifts are—not to mention how well they play in other arenas—and always in one of those famous, oh-so-classy blue gift boxes.
Of course we shouldn’t bypass Cartier; and while some of the gifts shown are a bit ho-hum the leopard cubs are adorable.
If I say do so myself, I am a gifting genius. My nieces and friends will attest to my skill at finding what they really wanted; as far as I know, not one of my gifts was ever exchanged. I was a PANK (Professional Aunt, No Kids) decades before it became common, but now there is help for those who are chanllenged.
These days being green and socially responsible are all the rage. This is especially true with teens and twenty-somethings and while some folks really mean it, others merely pay lip-service, but how can you tell the difference?
Holiday gifting is a great time to find out who actually walks the walk or are all talk by giving a gift that helps change the world for people in far greater need than you or they are likely to ever know—in fact, for as little as $52 you can change a Haitian family’s life forever.
A secondary benefit of this kind of gift is the gleeful fun you will have watching the reactions of those who are all talk.
A Friday series exploring Startups and the people who make them go. Read allIf the Shoe Fits posts here
I confess; I don’t do Facebook or Twitter, but I do watch TV at night when I’m doing stuff that doesn’t require full focus.
I watch enough to detest the lack of creativity in most ads, but I save my greatest antipathy for the drug ads.
Mostly because the images are in such opposition to the warnings.
Cymbalta (anti-depressant) is a great example.
It is being sold as a pain reliever for people with arthritis and uses the tag line, “Imagine you with less pain.”
All I can think when they say that is, “Imagine you with all the side effects.”
The ads focus on best case analysis and only list possible side-effects because the law forces them to.
There is no real risk analysis; the good outcomes are used as cover for the downside.
This works because most of us prefer to focus on the positive.
In a 2008 column about entrepreneurs and risk Bill Buxton said, “The most dangerous way of all to play it is so-called safe. Safe leads to atrophy and certain death—of spirit, culture, and enterprise. There is not a single institution of merit or worthy of respect in our society that was not created out of risk. Risk is not only not to be avoided, it is to be embraced—for survival.”
That hasn’t changed, but there is smart risk and there is dumb risk and you need to know the difference sans dogmatic belief in your vision and rationalization.
The best way to evaluate risk, whether of a drug, promotion, romantic offer, etc., is to give equal thought to three things.
Best case: what positives do I expect from this action? (no pain)
Worst case: what negatives do I need to consider? (side effects)
If the results of number 2 can be handled go forward; if not revise the action.
The problem is not risk; risk is good, as well as necessary, for you or any entity that wants to move forward.
But ‘good’ requires balanced evaluation of the best and the worst.
Option Sanity™ neutralizes excessive ISO allocation risk.
Come visit Option Sanity for an easy-to-understand, simple-to-implement stock allocation system. It’s so easy a CEO can do it.
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As Laurie Cronenbold, who just received a patent for a snap-on protective cup that a player can easily remove the moment he leaves the field, said, “Moms solve problems.”
Pam Ryan designed and patented a softball helmet incorporating an enlarged panel for long hair or a ponytail; she licensed it in 1998 and has sold more than a million units.
Barb Chaisson designed a cushioned bandage for girls (and some boys) who wear earrings and play soccer and other sports.
Then there are the entrepreneurs whose compassion drives them to follow their hearts and solve problems.
Two of my favorites are the ball that never dies and a totally new take on the water wheel.
Tim Jahnigen developed a ball that would never wear out, go flat or need a pump out of PopFoam, a hard foam made of ethylene-vinyl acetate similar to the stuff used to make Crocs, that brings undiluted joy to children around the world.
Cynthia Koenig dreamed up the Wello WaterWheel that moves 25 gallons of water at one time eliminating the 25% of their time women in developing countries spend carrying five gallon jugs (42 lbs.) on their heads along with the resulting injuries.
So look around; there’s a lot that needs fixing and some of those fixes could be simmering in your brain.
SUBMIT YOUR STORY Be the Thursday feature – Entrepreneurs: [your company name] Share the story of your startup today. Send it along with your contact information and I’ll be in touch. Questions? Email or call me at 360.335.8054 Pacific time.
“That culture is like the air we breathe or the water that fish swim in. It has the potential, for better or worse, to affect everybody in the same way.” –Dr. Linda H. Pololi, a senior scientist at Brandeis University
Dr. Pololi was talking about the culture in academic medicine negatively affecting men as well as women, although the women’s situation has a higher profile.
While the information in the article is interesting, as well as unexpected in part, it’s her comment at the end on which I want to focus.
As a manager you set the culture of your own group; it may closely resemble your company’s culture or may be wildly divergent.
The divergence is not always a bad thing—many managers have created great cultures in the midst of toxic ones.
By the same token, toxic mini cultures have been propagated within good company cultures by managers who believe that approach is the best way to manage.
I’m posting the December Leadership Development Carnival today, because its regular location as an Expand Your Mind feature is taken next week as promised Saturday. This is a sacrifice for me because posting it early enough for East Coast readers to have with their morning coffee means doing it in the middle of my night—but anything for you, dear readers. Fortunately, host Jennifer Miller at The People Equation posts early in her morning so, with the time difference, my post will only be a bit later than normal. I also want you to have it early enough this month that you can use it as an educational cover if/when you have any holiday slow time—there’s always lots of great stuff in this carnival.
Regular carnival host Dan McCarthy of Great Leadership kicks off the carnival with A Manager’s Guide to Crying at Work. It’s a pragmatic, yet compassionate discussion on the science and dynamics of tears in the workplace.
Chery Gegelman of Giana Consulting offers up Comfort or Magic? Stay? Go? Go? Stay? in which a simple Venn diagram from Debbie Laskey and song lyrics by Jimmy Durante have inspired Chery to think of change in a whole new way.
Guy Farmer says “Leadership is about seeing change as an opportunity to grow and succeed rather than sticking one’s head in the sand and hoping it will go away.” See more at his Unconventional Training blog with Leadership and Welcoming Change.
CULTURE AND ENGAGEMENT
Julie Winkle Giulioni’s latest blog post identifies four characteristics that leaders must have to create a supportive environment in Cultures that Support Career Development.
Mark Miller of Great Leaders Servebelieves that “the collective habits of people can be a powerful asset to any organization, or they can be a tremendous liability.” Mark post suggests four ways to create a vibrant culture that will help in Today’s Challenge: Culture as Competitive Advantage.
Over at Jesse Lyn Stoner’s blog, she explores 8 Things Collaborative Leaders Know. Says Jesse: “The good news is anyone can be a collaborative leader, regardless of role. Because they understand these 8 truths about today’s world, collaborative leaders are able to build successful networked communities.”
Kristal Sauer explores Control v. Openness in a Mobile World in which she asks, “Have you considered how mobile capabilities continue to play a more central role in the way we work, the careful balance between security and productivity, and the challenge in how to establish parameters forhow employees use mobile technology to do their jobs?” See more at Let Go and Lead.
Karin Hurt of Let’s Grow Leaders offers up this interesting thought: “Empowerment is easy when things are going smoothly, but what about when someone makes a really bad decision?” Her post Empowerment Run Amok: How One Bad Decision Leads to Another explores how leaders can respond well and maintain the trust of their followership.
DEVELOPMENT
Addressing performance problems with employees is an opportunity to either build or erode trust with those you lead. In his post Addressing Poor Performance is a “Moment of Trust”, Randy Conley outlines 5 steps on how leaders can use these challenging situations to build trust and get an employee’s performance back on track. Via the Leading with Trust blog.
Let Em Shine, says Andy Uskavitch, CM, of the Supervision-Motivation blog. Andy says that clear communication and direction helps staff to shine on their own.
Sharlyn Lauby generated excellent discussion by creating a distinction between coaching and mentoring on her HR Bartender blog. Sharlyn says, “Mentors and coaches are two different things. For that reason, maybe it’s good to have both. Choosing the right one depends on the situation.” See more at Mentors or Coaches – Why You Need Both.
LEADING WITH CHARACTER
John Bossong, writing for the Lead Change Group blog, offers up 8 Reasons Why Pride Is the Core of Leadership Failure. In this post, John details the risks of unchecked pride and the solution which is humility. Humility isn’t being weak; it’s accurately knowing where you stand. John provides 8 practical ways you can move your organization away from pride and toward humility.
Mary Jo Asmus says, “Reluctance, resistance and anger may be caused by fear of taking action in the workplace. Here’s how to determine if fear is negatively driving you and an important question to ask yourself to overcome it.” See more in her post A Question of Courage.
Dr. Anne Perschel resorts to prose and declares “there is one and only one reason to lead. Furthermore, if you can lead on behalf of same, you must” in The Only Reason to Lead on Germaine Insights.
Over at the Horizon Point Consulting blog Captain Davis Ozier, U.S. Army, suggests reversing the order of a familiar methodology used by the military to achieve more empowerment in Task- Purpose- Endstate.
PERSONAL EFFECTIVENESS
Susan Mazza of Random Acts of Leadership asks, “What if holding someone to account is actually the process of holding them up to be the best they can be every step of the way rather than hammering them down after they fail?” See her answer in the thought-provoking Accountability is Not about Justice.
How influential are you as a leader? Neal Burgis, Ph.D. of Practical Solutions offers Influential Leadership Trait in which he discusses the specific influential traits of business leadership.
Wally Bock of Three Star Leadership says, “You’re not going to succeed every time. So it’s a good idea to consider how to get the maximum return on your failure.” Spot on, Wally! See more with Return on Failure.
What does it mean for leaders who must choose whether to go with data or experts when making important decisions? Mark Bennett of the TalentedApps blogging group covers this issue in Data vs. Experts: Nine Years On.
On his blog More Leadership, Bernd Geropp tells this story: “As a true leader you want committed people who contribute and act on your behalf – then you must first explain what the point is. Why should they follow you and your rules? I just recently learned about this at a cash register of a grocery discounter when someone wanted to buy red wine.” He makes the connection of these seemingly disparate things in Why? Rules, Purpose and Merlot!
Where do you focus your impatience? Is it focused on your important things in life? Jon Mertz of the Thin Difference blog says, “Our life needs the right balance to keep our pace and stride focused.” He elaborates in Where Is Your Impatience Placed?
Zig Ziglar, for 40 years one of the best know motivational speakers, died last week. He left behind thousands of inspired people and, based on the value and profusion of his sound bites, there will be thousands more in the future. Here are a few of my favorites and you can find many more here.
If you want to live a happy successful life, the first thing you need to grasp is, “Every choice you make has an end result.”
You need to make your choice based on who you are and what you know at that moment then “Expect the best. Prepare for the worst. Capitalize on what comes.”
It’s also true that, “Money isn’t the most important thing in life, but it’s reasonably close to oxygen on the “gotta have it” scale.” Keep in mind that too much oxygen isn’t necessarily beneficial.
Everybody’s heard that success is the result of hard work, but I like Ziglar’s way of saying it best, “Success is dependent upon the glands – sweat glands.”
A good dose of optimism is always useful and, again, Ziglar provides a better definition than most, “An optimist is someone who goes after Moby Dick in a rowboat and takes the tartar sauce with him.”
What I really get a kick out of are how apropos his comments on marriage are when applied to management.
For example, “Many marriages would be better if the husband and the wife clearly understood that they are on the same side,” so would the different departments and teams in most companies.
And if you want a few telling words on how to manage the persons on your team, consider changing the fifth word in this comment, “If you treat your wife like a thoroughbred, you’ll never end up with a nag”
Finally, considering we just finished with a really nasty election (at all levels); I couldn’t resist these two gems.
The first seems to fit all the ideologues that ran for office, “Little men with little minds and little imaginations go through life in little ruts, smugly resisting all changes which would jar their little worlds.”
And the second seems to fit a larger percentage of the population each year, “A narrow mind and a fat head invariably come on the same person”
Entrepreneurs face difficulties that are hard for most people to imagine, let alone understand. You can find anonymous help and connections that do understand at 7 cups of tea.
Crises never end.
$10 really does make a difference and you’ll never miss it,
In an article focused on meetings and importance of being direct Tony Tjan, CEO and Managing Partner of The Cue Ball Group, says, “When we avoid conflict or try to skirt directness, it does a disservice to all involved, and often just plain wastes time.”
Last week you got a glimpse of a few 
I confess; I don’t do Facebook or Twitter, but I do watch TV at night when I’m doing stuff that doesn’t require full focus.
“Necessity is the mother of invention” is a well-worn truth, but compassion runs it a close second.
Dr. Pololi was talking about the 
I’m posting the 
