That’s right; all week. I’m taking the week off to get stuff done — some of which should have been done months ago.

Rather than leaving you with nothing to do (that’s a joke), I thought I’d provide a week of past Thanksgiving posts. Some are for fun, but, hopefully, others will prove thought-provoking.

Today’s is called Getting through an F Day.

Read other Golden Oldies here.

Did you know Thanksgiving is an F day?

There are five Fs that come immediately to mind, they are fun, family, friends, food and football.

Of those five only one comes close to being guaranteed good and that’s food, but even food isn’t a given. There was the year that my host’s two Siamese cats stole the turkey—dragged it off the platter, dropped it to the floor, dragged it across an Aubusson carpet and were on the way out one door when I entered another.

Football often depends on whether your team wins, although a good game, as opposed to a romp, can make the difference.

Friends are often a better bet than family since you can pick and choose, but that only works if you’re the host. One friend always invited two people he knew would ignite—one year it was an Arab and an Israeli just after the Six Day War. Talk about fireworks, more like bombs.

Then, of course, there is family. Family is family and blood may be thicker than water, but that doesn’t mean putting the family together in one room will always generate sweetness and light—too often there is a large dose of vinegar and sour grapes. It’s said that leopards don’t change their spots and neither do family members. If they are difficult or you can’t stand them 364 days of the years, they won’t change for the 365^th day.

Fun depends either on the first four or your ability to take a step back and laugh—at the food, the game, your friends, your family and, most of all, yourself.

Laughter is the balm that soothes a holiday rash; apply liberally and often.

Image credit: auntjojo on flickr

A Friday series exploring Startups and the people who make them go. Read all If the Shoe Fits posts here.

Yesterday we looked at how dangerous it is to substitute what-we-wish for what-really-is and I promised you a look at startups that died as a result.

Which is what I’m going to do, but not by reinventing the wheel (there’s enough of that without a contribution from me,)

CB Insights put together a great list of 178 failed startups — why they failed as told by their founders or, occasionally, an investor — including links to the full articles.

I hope you take the time to read through, especially those that parallel your own markets, circumstances, etc.

Save the list as a reference; the lessons learned could keep you from stepping in the poo now or somewhere down the road.

Image credit: HikingArtist

For years I’ve interacted with entrepreneurs from the US and other countries. And while they have many traits in common, there is one that never ceases to amaze me — their approach to their users.

Maybe ‘approach’ is the wrong word; perhaps attitude or interpretation or wishful thinking is closer.

Your users are who they are, not who you want them to be.

That means it doesn’t matter if you/your friends/peers think it’s cool.

Or that you/your friends/peers like the style/fashion/etc.

That’s why Lean Methodology says to get out of your office, your comfort zone, and talk to your market.

Actually, rather than talking, you should listen to your market.

Truly listen.

Hear what they are really saying, instead of hearing what you want to hear.

Doing the latter has sunk many a startup.

Be sure to come back tomorrow for a look at some of them.

Image credit: Ky

Words are incredibly powerful.

If you’ve ever doubted that the recent election is absolute proof.

Words reflect who you are.

Words can bring people together or drive them apart.

Words can wound or empathize; they can build or destroy.

You are the only person responsible for your words, there is no way to pass the blame for things you say — or don’t say.

Knowing that, I kept these Anon quotes foremost in my mind, until they became unconscious habit.

The first

Be quicker of mind than of tongue.

leads directly to the second

I am the master of my unspoken words and a slave to those that should have remained unspoken.

There is a third, that is far less eloquent, but sums things up nicely.

Be sure to start brain before putting mouth in gear.

Image credit: TRF_Mr_Hyde

I read an interesting article about hard work vs talent by Ed Latimore.

For those of you (like me) who never heard of Ed Latimore, he is a boxer (12-0 w/7 KOs), who also writes books and is a motivational speaker.

Take a minute to read the whole thing, but here is the most important take-away.

If you have nothing particularly special about your mind or body, you always have hard work. The ability to work your ass off is underrated as a talent because we consider talent something special, unique, and largely unteachable. (…) working your ass off is a talent you can learn.

Along with hard work, you need to develop your initiative.

Initiative is a muscle and you have dozens of opportunities to exercise it every day.

It’s simple.

Anything you notice, large or small, that needs to be done, do it.

That’s all.

Do it and initiative becomes a habit, just like hard work.

And I can pretty much guarantee that those two habits will take you almost anywhere you want to go.

Image credit: Ralf Peter Reimann

It’s amazing to me, but looking back over more than a decade of writing I find posts that still impress, with information that is as useful now as when it was written.

Golden Oldies is a collection of what I consider some of the best posts during that time.

There’s not a lot to add to this post. The cited research is still accurate, as is the results comparison. That said, many managers are still providing too much, too little or, worse, none at all. But their complaints haven’t diminished, nor their solution to shift the responsibility to their people, instead of recognizing that they are the ones who need to change.

Read other Golden Oldies here.

How much management/coaching is too much?

I hear that question a lot.

Most managers want to do a good job and are looking for ways to improve.

But, as one commented recently, if you do everything recommended by the experts you would use so much of each person’s time that productivity would tumble and even the best coaching would have a negative impact.

Which is why I say that management and coffee are similar.

In the right amount coffee is good for your brain and may help you live longer.

The right amount of management/coaching is good for the brain in that it provides challenges that foster growth; it also lowers frustration and stress, which enhances mental and physical health.

According to the research, the “right” amount of coffee is around 20 ounces a day, i.e., one venti-size Starbucks.

That equates to the most effective management/coaching, which provides all the information needed to do the job at one time (not more nor less) and then gets out of the way while staying accessible if needed.

Many of the coffee-fueled are more likely to drink three to five ventis a day, which is detrimental to health and longevity.

A comparable amount of management/coaching is detrimental to health, productivity and retention.

Flickr image credit: Kurtis Garbutt

A Friday series exploring Startups and the people who make them go. Read all If the Shoe Fits posts here

How much do you rely on the so-called “wisdom of crowds” when you’re making decisions?

Do you think for yourself or check everything, from where to eat to the best language to use, against the “wisdom of crowds?”

If this election taught you nothing else it should have taught you that crowds aren’t particularly bright.

Stupid is more accurate

When I wrote The Value of Thinking in 2013 I asked a simple question.

But what happens to the crowd when everybody stops bothering to think?

At that point the old saying, everyone has a right to be stupid, but some just abuse the privilege, kicks in with a vengeance.

In the March redux I said,

…crowdthinking has increased geometrically, while independent thinking, let alone deep thinking, has decreased in proportion. You have only to consider the questions on Quora and the crowd’s actions/reactions at any political rally to see just how bad it’s become.

From failed startups to Tuesday’s election the wisdom of crowds has led down more garden paths than can be counted.

But for the legion of readers who demand hard data to back up common sense I give you the words of Anand Sanwal and the data of CB Insights.

Can we please never utter ‘wisdom of the crowds’?
I know lots of management consultants sold corporations on this “wisdom of crowds” nonsense, but can we now stop?
Here is what the crowd thought of Trump’s chances over time.
Totally, utterly stupid crowd.

Stupid crowds do immeasurable damage.

Image credit: HikingArtist and CB Insights

On October 28 one glass ceiling was shattered.

Therese Tucker just broke a glass ceiling as the first woman founder/CEO to lead a venture-capital-backed Los Angeles startup to an initial public offering, according to The Los Angeles Times’ Paresh Dave.

Not just a woman, but a woman of a certain age, 55, who built her company, BlackLine, over the last 15 years the hard way.

“I funded the company up until 2013, and there were some very difficult times,” she said. “I ended up putting in everything that I had into it. First the nest egg from my options from my previous company. But then I drained my bank accounts and my 401(k). I told my kids, had I been able to access their college savings funds, I probably would have taken that, too. I second-mortgaged my house. I maxed out my credit cards. I begged from friends to cover payroll.
It was difficult and humiliating and scary. I thought, ‘Oh my god, I’m going to be a woman in my 40s who’s bankrupt and starting over,'” she said of the years through about 2005.

That’s grit — the thing everyone is talking about.

BlackLine went public $2 above the target price and soared from there.

On Friday morning, the shares opened at $24.52, a 44% pop. The stock was trading at around $23.31 midday, giving the company a $1.15 billion market cap.

The result of that $2 increase meant raising $46 million more than than the $100 million planned.

Tucker didn’t build BlackLine by raising round after round of funding in an easy money environment—she bootstrapped it.

She did, however, jump on a still unproven new technology/business model.

The turning point happened in 2007, when the idea of cloud computing was very new. She and her team decided to quit making old-fashioned software and sell the service exclusively through the cloud.

And that was true grit.

Congratulations, Therese Tucker.

One Ceiling Down and a few more to go.

This post is dedicated to every woman of every age who has put herself at risk to follow her dreams — whether as an entrepreneur or something else.

Image credit: California Community Foundation

Here we are; a third of the way through the fourth quarter and two great things are happening today.

1. We can all celebrate: no more political ads. Hooray!
2. I’m sharing some great information from some of the best thinkers on all the subjects it takes to be a great boss/leader/manager these days.

So dig in, enjoy, and learn.

Anne Perschel of Germane Coaching and Consulting submitted How Real Leaders Apologize and Mean It. Anne summarizes, “Real leaders don’t apologize AS IF they mean it. They actually mean it because they are empathetic. Empathy is the first of four elements in a genuine apology.” Follow Anne on Twitter at @bizshrink.

Beth Beutler of H.O.P.E. Unlimited provided How to Get Along with the Colleague Who is Faster Than You. Beth recaps, “Do you sometimes have to work with a colleague whose pace is faster than yours? Beth Beutler gives some techniques for navigating swift waters in business relationships.” Find Beth on Twitter at @bethbeutler.

Chris Edmonds of the Purposeful Culture Group contributed Culture Leadership Charge: Be Present. In this post, Chris charges leaders with the importance of being fully present, so they don’t send a message of “you’re not that important.” Follow Chris on Twitter at @scedmonds.

Dan McCarthy of Great Leadership provided Leaders Should Define More Than the Mountain Top, but Less Than the Whole Plan. Dan recaps, “When it comes to defining their vision, leaders tend to fall into two camps. Camp one can clearly articulate a mountain top they want to reach, but create zero clarity on how they’re going to get to that mountain top. Camp two has their mountain top defined and they also have a step-by-step guide to get from where they are today (base camp) to their mountain top. Both camps fail to create sustained motivation in their people. Guest author Hamish Knox explains why.” Locate Dan on Twitter at @greatleadership.

Dana Theus of InPower Coaching contributed Dear Dana Workplace Advice: New To the Team And Dealing With Workplace Bullying By A Colleague. Dana writes, “Dear Dana, I recently joined a new team and one of my colleagues is treating me like the hired help! I’m not sure what to do since I am new on the team and don’t want to get a reputation early on for being difficult or refusing to do work. Help! — Signed, Between a rock and a hard place in Iowa.” Find Dana on Twitter at @DanaTheus.

David Dye of Trailblaze submitted How to Lead When It Looks Impossible. David summarizes, “Every leader faces challenges that look impossible. David offers encouragement and practical next steps based on a recent mountain he and Karin Hurt climbed.” Follow David on Twitter at @davidmdye.

David Grossman of The Grossman Group shared 7 Requirements of a Strategic Messaging Methodology. David writes, “What is a Strategic Messaging Methodology, and what can it do for you, your leaders, and your organization? Simply put, it’s a process that helps you think strategically about how you develop your story, drive alignment, and tell it powerfully—whether it’s a large organizational story or whether you want to communicate change inside your organization. ” Discover David on Twitter at @thoughtpartner.

Evan Sinar of Development Dimensions International (DDI) provided LeaderPulse: The 5 Most Valuable Gifts Most Leaders Aren’t Getting. Evan recaps, “If you missed Boss’s Day last month, it’s never too late for employees to recognize their life-changing leaders. We looked to our research to come up with five less common, but more valuable gifts.” Find Evan on Twitter at @evansinar.

Jill Malleck of Epiphany at Work contributed They Told You What They Think of You, Now What?. Jill shares, “Getting 360 degree feedback anonymously can be overwhelming and cause anxiety. Jill explains how you can pluck out the meaningful messages and take positive action.” Find Jill on Twitter at @epiphanyatwork.

Jesse Lyn Stoner of the Seapoint Center shared  7 Fail-Safe Steps to Increase Responsibility and Develop Your Team . Jesse Lyn recaps, “If you’re not offering your people the opportunity to grow – to increase their responsibility and learn new skills – you are going to lose them. But increasing responsibility without also delegating authority is a recipe for disaster. And simply delegating is not always the answer either.” Follow Jesse Lyn on Twitter at @JesseLynStoner.

Jim Taggart of Changing Winds provided Samsung’s Failed Executive Leadership. Jim shares, “Being the top leader of an organization, whether in the public or private sphere, is no easy task. What’s more appropriately called executive managerial leadership (as opposed to the overused, feel good term “leadership”), those at the helm of companies or government agencies have huge responsibilities.” Find Jim on Twitter at @72keys.

Joel Garfinkle of the Career Advancement Blog submitted 5-Step Plan to Developing Your Personal Brand. Joel recaps: “Have you developed your personal brand? No? Then it’s no surprise that you’re not moving up in your career. Implement this 5-step plan for career advancement.” Discover Joel on Twitter at @JoelGarfinkle.

John Hunter of the Curious Cat Management Improvement Blog shared Bell Labs Designing a New Phone System Using Idealized Design. John summarizes, “The basic idea of idealized design is to create a new design for a product, service or the organization based on what is feasible today (but without being limited by the constraints of the existing state). Then, use that ideal to guide you as you figure out a plan to move from the existing state to that idealized design.” Find John on Twitter at @curiouscat_com.

Jon Mertz of Thin Difference contributed Discontentment: A Great Leadership Challenge. Jon shares, “Discontentment seems to be reaching epidemic proportions. What can we do as leaders to begin to unravel it? ” Follow Jon on Twitter at @thindifference.

Jon Verbeck of JonVerbeck.com provided The Dashboard May be the Most Important Part of Your Company Vehicle. In this post, Virtual CFO Jon Verbeck explains the important parts of a financial dashboard for your company. Find Jon on Twitter at @jonverbeck1.

Julie Winkle-Giulioni of Julie Winkle-Giulioni provided Whoa! What are today’s most common leadership mistakes? Julie recaps, “As counterintuitive as it may seem, well-meaning leaders undermine staff development – and ultimately results – not because they are doing too little but because they are doing too much.” Find Julie on Twitter at @julie_wg.

Karin Hurt of Let’s Grow Leaders contributed 7 Things Your High-Performance Employees Long to Hear You Say. Karin recaps, “Your high-performing employees never seem like the MIT (Most Important Thing), but the truth is, when I meet with them and ask what they need, I hear about things they long for from their boss.” Follow Karin on Twitter at @letsgrowleaders.

Lisa Kohn of Thoughtful Leaders contributed Four Key Steps to Being, and Getting More Done. Lisa shares why we need to spend at least as much time “being” as “doing,” and how to do this in our too-busy world. Follow Lisa on Twitter at @thoughtfulldrs.

Marcella Bremer of Leadership and Change Magazine provided The Power of Less: Get More Done. Marcella recaps, “I love Leo Babauta’s message from The Power Of Less. It sounds so simple, but it’s easier said than done: Identify the essential and eliminate the rest. If you spread yourself too thin; it dilutes your power and effectiveness. Do you do little of too many things? Or do you focus on just one big goal?” Find Marcella on Twitter at @marcellabremer.

Mary Jo Asmus of Aspire Collaborative Services LLC submitted Do Less and Be More of a Leader. Mary Jo summarizes, “Being a people leader requires you to shift your mindset into knowing who you are and developing yourself within that framework.” Follow Mary Jo on Twitter at @mjasmus.

Mary Ila Ward of Horizon Point Consulting contributed Leaders and Runners, Don’t Run the Race Alone. She recaps, “In ‘Leaders and Runners, Don’t Run the Race Alone,’ Mary Ila encourages leaders to arm themselves with a wingman or wingwoman and provides tips on how leaders can gain ‘wing strength,’ emphasizing that ‘All runners, and leaders, especially those out for the long haul, need a wingman.’” Discover Mary Ila on Twitter at @maryilaward.

Michael Lee Stallard of Michael Lee Stallard submitted Finish 2016 Strong: Refocus, Reconnect, Reenergize . Michael shares, “With 2016 rapidly drawing to a close, now is the time to establish your plan to finish the year strong. Michael Stallard shares advice for leaders on meeting year-end goals.” Follow Michael on Twitter at @michaelstallard.

Miki Saxon of MAPping Company Success contributed Golden Oldie: Customer Service Week 2016. Miki writes, “There is much talk, and even some action, about “enhancing customer experience,” but, when you’re a line manager, who exactly are your customers?” Discover Miki on Twitter at @optionsanity.

Neal Burgis of Burgis Successful Solutions submitted Leaders, Start Viewing Setbacks as Opportunities. Neal recaps, “Too many leaders get flustered when a business setback occurs. You need to take a step back and look at what happened and take action to move forward.” Find Neal on Twitter at @exec_solutions.

Paul LaRue of The UPwards Leader contributed How To Lead With A Sandbox Culture. Paul summarizes, “Striking a balance between cultural and operational parameters that allows your employees room to innovate is always a challenge. Thinking of it as a sandbox in a playground will help that balance.” Follow Paul on Twitter at @paul_larue.

Randy Conley of Leading With Trust shared 10 Ways Leaders Can Easily Build Trust with Their New Teams. Randy writes, “Trust doesn’t ‘just happen’ by accident. It takes intentional effort and leaders need to have a specific game plan to establish and nurture trust in relationships. Randy Conley offers advice from the trenches in this post.” Find Randy on Twitter at @randyconley.

Shelley Row of Shelley Row submitted Pushing a Wheel Chair: Lessons in Servant Leadership. In this piece, Shelley shared lessons learned about servant leadership as she took on caregiving responsibilities for her husband.” Discover Shelley on Twitter at @shelleyrow.

Susan Mazza of Random Acts of Leadership provided I Choose to Honor You. Susan explains, “If we truly want to be constructive participants and collaborators in our democracy, we need to bring a better spirit to our conversations with each other. We need to start talking with one another about the things that are hard to talk about, to engage in conversations with people who do not look or think like us, so we can learn. We need to be far more curious and much more discerning about what we believe and what we think we know, and seek truth rather than assume we are being told the truth.” Follow Susan on Twitter at @susanmazza.

Tanveer Naseer of Tanveer Naseer submitted Why Expressing Gratitude Through Our Leadership Matters. Tanveer explains the post is, “A look at how expressing gratitude can help leaders bring out the best in those they lead and drive their organizations to succeed.” Discover Tanveer on Twitter at @tanveernaseer.

Wally Bock of Three Star Leadership submitted Thoughts on Retirement and Purpose. Wally recaps, “People need a purpose. Without purpose, there’s not much reason to get up in the morning.” Find Wally on Twitter at @wallybock.

“Ownership” is the difference between having employees who care and those who are just along for the ride.

Jim Haskett, Harvard business School professor emeritus, hosts lively conversations around current research he and his colleagues have done. The comment period is roughly two weeks and the ideas/comments are as interesting as Haskett’s original post.

Are Employees Becoming Job ‘Renters’ Instead of ‘Owners’? is the most recent and is critical to any manager looking to foster an engaged workforce.

In our work, we found that an “owner”—either a loyal employee or customer who takes responsibility for improving relationships, products, and processes as well as referring new employee candidates or customers—can be worth more than a hundred “renters—”those who are only involved with the organization to complete one or more transactions.

Think about it; why would Uber drivers care about the company — to use Haskett’s terms, they rent the job.

It isn’t just the so-called on-demand jobs that hire renters. There are plenty of them in full-time positions and, surprisingly, even in companies such as Google and Facebook.

In a recent Golden Oldie we considered the truism that “you get what you give” when it comes to respect and that’s true about most things.

Another old saying is also very true — people don’t quit companies, they quit managers.

In companies with “real” jobs, it’s the managers who determine whether employees are owners or renters.

Be sure to click over, read the comments and add your own.

Image credit: chispita_666