A Work/Life Lesson
by Miki Saxon
I want to share a series of email with you today because they show up a very important point and apply to employees at all levels. The emails are from ‘Brian’, an aMillennial, who writes me on and off when he wants a sounding board or, at times, advice.
Before I had time to respond to the first one, the next two had arrived.
Hey Miki, I just want your opinion on this…
I had just finished a large project that had been assigned to me by my boss’s boss. I had completed it last week, doubled up on my work, went over it with my boss, and gotten it approved to bring in front of HIS boss. So we do, she liked it, end of that story. This report was to be presented to some important people within the company during a meeting that was on Monday. That same day I got this request from my boss to make printouts of some pages – actually, 6 custom printouts. Basically this was to be about 6 copies of a 10-12 page packet. He to add headers to my project spreadsheet (which was 8 worksheets) and get those printed out for the big meeting. I said “Alright, I can do that” and began my task. He was setting me up for failure.
10-15 minutes later he comes rushing up to my desk asking for the printouts. I wasn’t finished because I had to make a custom header for 8 worksheets, print out about 60 pages of about 4 different files (while other people were printing), and then customize the packets for each of the individuals in the meeting. This didn’t sit well with him and he made some snarky comment like “How long does it take to print out some sheets? Jeeze.” Fast-forward to today and he hasn’t spoken to me unless I speak to him first (which was once and it was a simple question).
The kicker is he has a printer on his desk, the files are online, and everyone has a laptop.
So I feel I was set up for disaster. I am the lowest paid in the department, the most tech-savvy, and a pretty well-rounded employee…except for the fact that I just got out of college and need more
Direction than your average employee, it feels like I am on the verge of getting fired… or sorry, I mean “rolled off” – I forgot contractors can’t get “fired.”
Miki
He recently (about 30 minutes ago) sent me an email stating: “Please take a look at this and make an action item log (excel) ….I want you to help me ensure that all of these items get completed. Bring this to the 3:30 meeting as well (if you can have it by then)”
This is a list of about 8 items… does this come across as condescending to you? I really don’t have any other tasks at the moment and I asked him for more stuff to do. I finished it in 10 minutes… if that.
Is this a reasonable assumption or am I being melodramatic?
Well I have a meeting with him at 3:30 today to talk about some documents I have edited – it is an hour meeting. I am hoping he will bring something up then. At this point I am in “freak out” mode.
After reading these three, my response was, Freaking out will only upset your digestion:) Treat this like any class you took with a tough teacher. Listen carefully and try not to interpret as you do. Doing that will make you miss stuff. And don’t freak if he doesn’t bring anything up. We can talk on your way home.
Hey Miki – I talked with my boss and he has just been INCREDIBLY busy – maybe I am over-analyzing. I may give you a call tomorrow – I think I should just sleep things off.
Brian’s realization that it was his boss’ schedule as opposed to his (Brian’s) work that was at the bottom of what happened is the first step to intelligent adulthood—a state at which many folks never arrive.
No matter your age or position, the unanswered email, the unreturned phone call, the forgotten whatever often have nothing to do with you, but everything to do with what is happening in the other person’s life.
So before you freak out or get down on a person take the time to find out what’s going on in their world; most of the time you’ll want to cut them some slack.
More on this tomorrow at Ducks In A Row.
Your comments—priceless
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Image credit: wadem on flickr
October 13th, 2009 at 9:50 am
It does happen at all ages & levels. I’m in my mid-40s and middle management and have to talk myself off that ledge every once in awhile.
October 13th, 2009 at 1:40 pm
Hi Susan, I’m considerably past the mid-40s and still forget and fall off the ledge on occasion.
Thanks for stopping by and emphasizing that this isn’t something that you just outgrow.