Ducks in a Row: A Third Way to Handle Anger
by Miki Saxon
Ryan’s solution to getting angry is to respond after he’s slept; the vp in yesterday’s post went somewhere private to cool down before responding.
Both work, but there’s a third way.
The non-tech world already figured it out and the tech world is starting to admit that “move fast and break things” isn’t the smartest approach.
However, there is one good time to break things, although moving fast is optional.
That’s when you’re seriously angry and what may break is you.
Not good.
Instead, break a thing.
Contrary to what a lot of professionals tell you, hitting a ball or even a punching bag, no matter how hard, doesn’t always help.
Why? Because when all is said and done, hitting [whatever] is constructive, not destructive
And destructive feelings are usually immune to constructive action.
Smashing something is different.
Glasses or crockery — dishes, bowls, cups — work best and they’re cheap at garage sales and thrift shops.
The only caveat is to smash safely.
The easiest way is to get a really deep large box (the kind from a washer, dryer, etc.) and smash whatever you are using in that. If it’s too tall to throw straight down stand on a stool.
The important thing is to be able to throw really hard — smash as opposed to break.
First, focus your mind on your anger.
Then focus on the item you plan to smash and transfer your anger to the object.
Then smash it.
The goal is to destroy the feelings along with the object.
The number of items depends on the quantity of anger.
Best of all, it works.
I know.
I had a smashing station in my garage for years.
I don’t need it anymore.
Image credit: Ruth Hartnup
February 27th, 2019 at 10:45 am
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