We make less eye contact nowadays — and therefore have less empathy
Income inequality is on the rise, leading to jealousy and scorn
We work in open offices, which exacerbate existing problems
Exacerbating the loss of empathy are tools, such as Slack, that further reduce eye contact, even when working right beside someone. In fact, as mentioned yesterday, physical proximity doesn’t matter when communications are screen based.
While bullying bosses are falling out of fashion, technology may encourage people to adopt harsher, less empathetic communication styles, said Liz Dolan, a former exec at Nike, OWN, and the National Geographic Channels. (…) “It makes it really hard for people to understand what boundaries are when they don’t really get to know each other because all their communication is online,” Dolan said. “We all know that it’s true that there are things you would say in an email or a text message to someone that you would never in a million years say to their face.”
What’s worse, researchers at the University of Florida have found rudeness to be contagious. So just one heated email can have a truly toxic ripple effect throughout your team.
According to Gallup Daily tracking, 32% of employees in the U.S. are engaged — meaning they are involved in, enthusiastic about and committed to their work and workplace.
… being physically close your colleagues doesn’t guarantee you’ll feed off their brainpower or work ethic. There must still be some aspect of social connection — be it joking around or thoughtful conversation — for health and productivity to improve.
“A more connected workforce is more likely to enjoy greater fulfillment, productivity, and engagement while being more protected against illness, disability, and burnout,”
In short, screen time -> less empathy -> more rudeness -> escalating disengagement -> increased loneliness = lower productivity and engagement.
This sequence of events has a very personal effect on you, too, in terms of poorer reviews, smaller raises, and fewer promotional opportunities.
In Japan, nearly two thirds of single people aren’t in a relationship and there are quasi-similar results in the US, although not exactly parallel. (The big difference in the studies is the focus on sex. Unlike Japan, not being in a relationship in the US has nothing to do with having/not having sex.)
However, craving companionship seems to be universal.
Enter Gatebox, which is similar to Amazon Echo, but with a platonic, She-like twist.
Yes, that is an artificially intelligent character who lives in a glass tube in your home. Her name is Azuma Hikari, and she’s the star of Gatebox — a $2,500 Amazon Echo-esque device that acts as a home assistant and companion.
At $2500 it isn’t cheap and there are a lot of caveats around it’s operation in the US, but that isn’t the point of this article.
The point is that even with a $2500 (298,000 yen) price tag and a year-long delivery wait it’s still pre-selling both here and Japan.
What a sad, lonely, connected world people inhabit these days.
Successful startups have spawned thousands of wealthy, young, predominantly male, workers who spend the majority of their daily 24 hours on a computer programming, gaming and surfing.
Additionally, more often than not, if they aren’t on their computer they’re doing the same stuff on their cell phone.
Most have little social life and fewer real-world social skills; more comfortable interacting with their buddies than with someone of the opposite sex.
Over the last few years ‘entrepreneur’ has come to mean anyone starting any kind of business.
The abundance and easy access to a myriad of Internet tools combined with the power of social media marketing makes it simple to start and run a business, whether it’s all online or has a real-world presence.
Josephine” — a local prostitute — arranges a collection of t-shirts across the table. They’re emblazoned with phrases like “Winter is Coming” and “Geeks Make Better Lovers.” She wears them in her online ads to catch the eye of the area’s well-off engineers and programmers.
“I’m trying to communicate to them that I understand a little bit what it’s like to be techy, nerdy, geeky,” she says. There’s another thing Josephine and her clients have in common: Like many of the techies she caters to, Josephine views herself as an entrepreneur. (…)”I’m quoting Belle de Jour, who did Secret Diary of a Call Girl, but you know, you sell the strength of your arms when you dig a hole. Selling our bodies — which everyone thinks of as this big scary thing — anyone who has a job that requires labor does that.”
I don’t see this as a bad thing, as long as pimps, drugs and coercion are not present and the cops seem to agree.
Kyle Oki of the San Jose Police Department, works on San Jose’s Human Trafficking Task Force, which focuses on stopping coerced prostitution. He sees technology as one of the sex trade’s biggest growth drivers.
Some of the women have day jobs, but not all.
“I consider the sex work that I do my career,” Siouxsie says. “I would like the podcast to be a vehicle to really humanize sex work and have people see that I am just a girl trying to make a living and pursue the American dream.”
What I do consider sad is that most of the guys don’t have a clue to handling themselves in social situations.
Stryker’s a comics fan with tattoos of molecules on her neck who considers herself a natural-born nerd, and is happy to “train” geeky clients on how to interact with those they’re smitten with. “You explain it to them in a way that’s like a formula,” she says. “Then they say ‘ohhhh, math. It’s math. Eventually if I plug these things into the formula, it will work.’
They both say the work is lonely. “Luckily, I have a buddy now who holds my camera for me,” Mr. Weisz said.
Ms. Mourey, on the other hand, still operates the camera by herself. She is adjusting to living alone in a city where, for all her Internet fame, she has few friends and rarely goes out.
Like lots of other YouTube personalities, Ms. Mourey said, “for the most part, we all just stay in our houses, alone, making videos.”
Your twenties used to be a time to learn about yourself in relation to other people; develop interpersonal skills that would last a lifetime and form relationships that would do the same.
It makes me wonder what kind of future life these kids will live.
A Friday series exploring Startups and the people who make them go. Read allIf the Shoe Fits posts here
During a recent conversation I heard several entrepreneurs say they didn’t have time, energy or money to invest in the holidays.
I get the money, but they are wrong about the time and energy, especially if they would like to goose both the creativity and productivity of themselves and their teams.
Just the act of getting away from your startup for a few hours, both mentally and physically and eating real food will clear your brain leading to improved creativity and productivity.
You can accelerate that improvement if you unplug completely.
The holidays are a tough time of year for many; even more so if they are feeling rejected—whether real or perceived.
Just touching a warm object seems to stem the feelings and subsequent depression and even loss of self-worth.
Notably, touching something warm after a feeling of ostracism — like holding a warm cup of coffee — is enough to halt and even reverse some of these autonomic responses. (…) The findings, of course, don’t just explain why so many lonely souls while away the hours at Starbucks, embracing a warm cup of joe.
Knowing that, you can jump your own efforts an order of magnitude by taking a few minutes to reach out to someone who is lonely—not just now, but all year ’round.
You may not have the time or energy to volunteer, but how much effort does it take when you’re getting coffee to chat with a stranger who looks down?
And who knows what great things will result or what you may learn from your caring effort?
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Way back in 2006 Tom Rath wrote a book called Vital Friends, in which he discusses the vital role friends play in our overall health, happiness and well-being.
“A vital friend could halve your chances of dying of heart disease; speed healing; and reduce your chances of getting cardiovascular disease, osteoporosis, arthritis, Type 2 diabetes, Alzheimer’s, and certain cancers.”
Now fast forward to 2012 where for many loneliness is rampant in spite of having dozens, hundreds or even thousands of Facebook friends and a similar number of followers on Twitter.
The isolation that is a hallmark of loneliness impacts people at work; after all, human emotions can’t be turned on and off like water faucets and some researchers are finally focusing on that.
Executives and managers might be surprised to learn that employees who have best friends at work are seven times more likely to be engaged in their jobs — and, if they have at least three vital friends at work, 96% more likely to be satisfied with their lives.
Loneliness is easily fixed, unlike depression (they are not synonymous)—all that is required is a friend.
This is important to you as a manager, since loneliness affects productivity and creativity.
What can you do?
Encourage better communications.
Provide an avenue for your people to connect in a relaxed atmosphere, whether at work or a more social get together.
Create a buddy system as part of your on boarding efforts.
But the most important action you can take is to pay attention to your people and not assume the problem will fix itself.
Entrepreneurs face difficulties that are hard for most people to imagine, let alone understand. You can find anonymous help and connections that do understand at 7 cups of tea.
Crises never end.
$10 really does make a difference and you’ll never miss it,
Successful startups have spawned thousands of wealthy, young, predominantly male, workers who spend the majority of their daily 24 hours on a computer programming, gaming and surfing.
During a recent conversation I heard several entrepreneurs say they didn’t have time, energy or money to invest in the holidays.
Way back in 2006 Tom Rath wrote a book called Vital Friends, in which he discusses the 
