Tuesday’s post involves lawyers, so I thought I’d check out what’s been said about them and it seems they’ve been unappreciated and unloved for centuries.

Clarence Darrow neatly summed up the problem with the law (no surprise there), “The trouble with law is lawyers.”

While Oliver Wendell Holmes offers a wonderful description of what they bill for, “Lawyers spend a great deal of their time shoveling smoke.”

Charles Lamb doesn’t sound too sure of lawyers’ antecedents, “Lawyers, I suppose, were children once.”

Will Rogers offers a typically witty explanation of when ‘ethical’ and ‘legal’ parted ways, “People are getting smarter nowadays; they are letting lawyers, instead of their conscience, be their guide.”

Lucille Ball explains the great contribution lawyers made to one of the most famous shows ever aired on television, “How I Love Lucy was born? We decided that instead of divorce lawyers profiting from our mistakes, we’d profit from them.”

Danny DeVito provides a cogent explanation of why people hire lawyers, “Of course I’ve got lawyers. They are like nuclear weapons, I’ve got em ’cause everyone else has. But as soon as you use them they screw everything up.”

Tammy Bruce reminds us that legal leopards don’t change their spots, “Unfortunately, what many people forget is that judges are just lawyers in robes.”

But it’s Thomas Jefferson who gets the last word today when he drives that point home, “If the present Congress errs in too much talking, how can it be otherwise in a body to which the people send one hundred and fifty lawyers, whose trade it is to question everything, yield nothing, and talk by the hour?”

Doesn’t seem much has changed over the years.

Flickr image credit: Mike Licht, NotionsCapital.com

When looking for a talented entry-level candidate, grades carry great weight with managers and HR.

This is especially true when hiring advanced degrees where starting salaries remain high and even more-so when the degrees are in the professions—doctors and lawyers.

Recruiters scour university campuses looking for what they judge to be the crème de la crème and you, the client, pay big bucks to access that talent.

Customers assume a certain level of integrity from educational institutions and equate grades with expertise.

So what happens to that integrity and those expectations when law schools lower the bar?

In the last two years, at least 10 law schools have deliberately changed their grading systems to make them more lenient. These include law schools like New York University and Georgetown, as well as Golden Gate University, Loyola Law School Los Angeles, and Tulane University, which just announced the change this month.

Granted, it’s being done in K-12 schools all over the country, but law school? And at some of the most prestigious US law schools, too.

These the same associates who do most of the real work when your company shells out $500 or more an hour to hire a name on the door.

Many will become judges, local, state and Federal—even to the Supreme Court.

Some will join Federal enforcement agencies—SEC, Justice, FBI.

And many will eventually enter politics, which is justified considering how far that bar has already been lowered.

What’s next? Well, we have a real shortage of doctors now that is getting worse as our population ages.

Doesn’t that give you a warm and fuzzy feeling in the pit of your stomach?

Flickr image credit: http://www.flickr.com/photos/johncohen/152850884/

Just three short goodies today.

Profits guaranteed. Isn’t it nice to know that some folks will make money as a result of the current disaster—and it isn’t even off stock options. All you need is a law degree and a spot at the right firm. Of course, you know who’s going to foot the bill, right?

Two other bits from Business Week; one could be considered investment intel and the other answers the question of why Ponzi schemes are popping up like mushrooms after a heavy rain.

Let Them Eat Big Macs

The swelling ranks of jobless can’t afford to dine out like they used to. While that’s bruising full-service restaurants, austerity is usually a plus for McDonald’s. The chain, which has been playing up its cheap eats, said on Jan. 26 that same-store sales jumped 7.2% worldwide in the fourth quarter, while operating income rose 11%. To pump up its numbers further in 2009, McDonald’s said it will spend $2.1 billion on construction, including 1,000 new outlets.

Ponzi, Ponzi Everywhere

Bernard Madoff may have pulled off the mother of all Ponzi schemes, but the downturn seems to be exposing lots of smaller-fry variants. On Jan. 26, for example, Nicholas Cosmo, suspected in a $380 million scam, surrendered to federal authorities on Long Island. The next day, FBI agents arrested Arthur Nadel, a Florida hedge fund adviser accused of bilking clients of tens of millions of dollars. Other cases in Florida, Georgia, Idaho, and Pennsylvania have recently come to light. Why now? Because in a downturn, investors often try to get their money out—and there’s no new cash coming in to pay them.

Image credit: flickr