Ducks in a Row: Listening vs. Hearing
by Miki Saxon
Ask most people if they hear people or listen to them and they’ll say they listen.
But if you are checking email, doing stuff on your smart phone; thinking about dinner, plotting a date with the hot guy/gal you chatted with while getting your morning coffee, listening to the conversation at the next table or any of a myriad of other things then you aren’t listening.
The difference between the sense of hearing and the skill of listening is attention.
Attention means you focus on the person talking.
Focus involves your eyes, ears and mind,
Focus does not include thinking about and formulating your reply based on the first part of what is said.
This is especially important if you are a boss.
Think of listening as an investment in your people that carries a high return.
Your ROI comes in the form of improved productivity, increased innovation and greater loyalty.
And the only cost is a little self-discipline.
What a deal.
Flickr image credit: Rich Anderson
November 13th, 2012 at 9:05 am
You are totally right, of course. The cost of a bit of self-discipline to really focus brings big dividends. I have seen both the advantages and what happens when leaders don’t listen.
I would add that focus also involves your heart. What I call wholehearted listening. I love the Chinese symbol for “To Listen.” It not only looks like a work of art, but it’s wise beyond the art. The left side of the symbol represents an ear. The top right side represents the individual – you. The eyes and undivided attention are next and finally there is the heart.
Essentially, the Chinese symbol reads – “When I’m listening to you, I give you my ears, my eyes, my undivided attention and my heart.” This is just about the best definition for what I like to call wholehearted listening.
Wholehearted listening requires all of you: listening with your body, your heart, your energy. It requires your total presence. You become a listener rather that just doing listening. (you can read more on my post about this: http://logosnoesis.com/to-listen)
Thanks for the reminder of the importance of listening.
November 13th, 2012 at 11:09 am
I agree, heart provides additional authenticity, but if you can’t add heart at least have the courtesy to pay attention!
Thanks for stopping bye and sharing your insights.