Yesterday I shared quotes about approval and promised you a story.

A few days ago a long-time reader, I’ll call him Jack, and I got back in touch.

Previously Jack had shared some of the problems and personal demons he was facing that were making him unhappy and holding him back.

Yesterday I could hear in his voice that he was a different guy. When I asked him how things were going he shared many of the processes and changes that had led to the new Jack.

It is one of his biggest changes that I want to share with you.

I am much stronger. My life doesn’t hinge on the approval of everyone around me. (I still chase it, but I don’t fall apart if I don’t get it)

Jack is not alone. We all look for approval from colleagues, friends and family, but especially from bosses, parents and our romantic interests.

Everybody chases approval in one way or another and that’s OK.

It’s not the wanting, but the needing that is the problem.

We need air to breathe, water, food and shelter.

We want nice clothes, cars, electronics and choice in everything.

Not having our needs met means misery; missing out on our wants is annoying and frustrating, but it doesn’t jeopardize our lives.

It took Jack more than a year of hard work to change his MAP and move approval from need to want, but he did it.

And so can you.

Flickr image credit: http://www.warningsigngenerator.com/

This entry was posted on Monday, July 26th, 2010 at 1:15 am and is filed under Personal Growth. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed.
Tags: approval, Change
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