Yesterday I shared emails from a reader who, at the end of the day, realized that he was over-reacting, his boss was insanely busy and nothing was wrong.
Today I want to share another story with you, only this one happened shortly after I entered the workforce.
There were seven of us in the office, everyone pulled their weight and we were a very congenial group often going out together for lunch or a drink after work.
One day “Jenny” didn’t come in and the next day she was late. Over the next few months she became cranky and very touchy. Her work slipped and the rest of us found ourselves picking up the slack. People started grumbling and, as they always do, the grumbles got back to our boss.
Fortunately, we had a very smart, proactive boss. He called a brief meeting on a morning that Jenny was absent and explained to us that her mother had been diagnosed with cancer; she was getting treatment, but in the meantime Jenny had to fill in for her.
We all knew that Jen had two younger sisters and that her dad had been out of the picture for years, so suddenly the dark circles, grouchiness, and missed days all started making sense. He told us that Jenny hadn’t said anything because she wasn’t looking for pity and the best thing we could do was to wait until she told us herself. In the meantime, he would appreciate it if we would desist from the grumbling and not-so-subtle comments.
That episode taught me a great lesson.
From then on, when someone didn’t do as expected or let me down in some way, my memory would flash to Jenny and I would take a deep breath and stomp on my reaction, because I didn’t know what was going on in their world.
I’d love to say that I always did this, but that would be a lie. But the older I got the more successful I was and I never regretted it. If the behavior continued I look for reasons and more often than not I found them.
Sure, there were times nothing was wrong and the person was just taking advantage of me and others, but more often they were under the gun, whether a derringer or a bazooka, and I was glad I didn’t make it worse.
So the next time someone lets you down, think about Jenny and cut them some slack; you’ll be glad you did.
I want to share a series of email with you today because they show up a very important point and apply to employees at all levels. The emails are from ‘Brian’, an aMillennial, who writes me on and off when he wants a sounding board or, at times, advice.
Before I had time to respond to the first one, the next two had arrived.
Hey Miki, I just want your opinion on this…
I had just finished a large project that had been assigned to me by my boss’s boss. I had completed it last week, doubled up on my work, went over it with my boss, and gotten it approved to bring in front of HIS boss. So we do, she liked it, end of that story. This report was to be presented to some important people within the company during a meeting that was on Monday. That same day I got this request from my boss to make printouts of some pages – actually, 6 custom printouts. Basically this was to be about 6 copies of a 10-12 page packet. He to add headers to my project spreadsheet (which was 8 worksheets) and get those printed out for the big meeting. I said “Alright, I can do that” and began my task. He was setting me up for failure.
10-15 minutes later he comes rushing up to my desk asking for the printouts. I wasn’t finished because I had to make a custom header for 8 worksheets, print out about 60 pages of about 4 different files (while other people were printing), and then customize the packets for each of the individuals in the meeting. This didn’t sit well with him and he made some snarky comment like “How long does it take to print out some sheets? Jeeze.” Fast-forward to today and he hasn’t spoken to me unless I speak to him first (which was once and it was a simple question).
The kicker is he has a printer on his desk, the files are online, and everyone has a laptop.
So I feel I was set up for disaster. I am the lowest paid in the department, the most tech-savvy, and a pretty well-rounded employee…except for the fact that I just got out of college and need more
Direction than your average employee, it feels like I am on the verge of getting fired… or sorry, I mean “rolled off” – I forgot contractors can’t get “fired.”
Miki
He recently (about 30 minutes ago) sent me an email stating: “Please take a look at this and make an action item log (excel) ….I want you to help me ensure that all of these items get completed. Bring this to the 3:30 meeting as well (if you can have it by then)”
This is a list of about 8 items… does this come across as condescending to you? I really don’t have any other tasks at the moment and I asked him for more stuff to do. I finished it in 10 minutes… if that.
Is this a reasonable assumption or am I being melodramatic?
Well I have a meeting with him at 3:30 today to talk about some documents I have edited – it is an hour meeting. I am hoping he will bring something up then. At this point I am in “freak out” mode.
After reading these three, my response was, Freaking out will only upset your digestion:) Treat this like any class you took with a tough teacher. Listen carefully and try not to interpret as you do. Doing that will make you miss stuff. And don’t freak if he doesn’t bring anything up. We can talk on your way home.
Hey Miki – I talked with my boss and he has just been INCREDIBLY busy – maybe I am over-analyzing. I may give you a call tomorrow – I think I should just sleep things off.
Brian’s realization that it was his boss’ schedule as opposed to his (Brian’s) work that was at the bottom of what happened is the first step to intelligent adulthood—a state at which many folks never arrive.
No matter your age or position, the unanswered email, the unreturned phone call, the forgotten whatever often have nothing to do with you, but everything to do with what is happening in the other person’s life.
So before you freak out or get down on a person take the time to find out what’s going on in their world; most of the time you’ll want to cut them some slack.
Here’s the Millennial solution for new grads who can’t find jobs: sue your alma mater.
That’s what Trina Thompson is doing to the tune of $72000; $2000 of which is compensation for the stress engendered by an unsuccessful three month job search; she graduated in April with a bachelor of business administration degree in information technology.
I’m not sure what planet Thompson is on, but she seems to think that her attendance record combined with a 2.7 GPA makes her a great find for any company.
Thompson finds major fault with the Monroe College Career Center…
“They’re supposed to say, ‘I got this student, her attendance is good, her GPA is all right — can you interview this person?’ They’re not doing that. They favor more toward students that got a 4.0. They help them more out with the job placement.”
Apparently it never dawned on her that it’s the companies who look for better GPAs.
And when did education come with a guarantee? Especially one that transcends all factors—economic conditions, grades, intelligence and, especially, attitude?
Apparently this business major hasn’t noticed the recession and has no understanding of the global economy.
She did show up, although learned very little based on her current actions.
Jim Gordon, who draws mY Generation for my other blog, graduated with a degree in industrial engineering and a similar GPA; he landed a three month internship and just received a full time offer.
What Jim has is a solid gold attitude, the kind that all managers want on their team; he doesn’t think he knows everything, wants to learn, assumes that attendance is a given not an accomplishment and that hard work is the name of the game—in short, he’s an aMillennial.
Thompson thinks that any new grad who doesn’t find a job should sue.
“It doesn’t make any sense: They went to school for four years, and then they come out working at McDonald’s and Payless. That’s not what they planned.”
After all, the world owes you—just ask Trina Thompson.
This follow-up to the article came Wednesday.
The Ski Channel has offered Thompson an entry level job. According to Founder/CEO Steve Bellamy, “Either Ms Thompson is a cunning out of the box thinker and we want he or she isn’t, and her position would not last long. Either way, the law suit would no longer be clogging up the courts because there are now no damages. She now has a bonifide job offer. She just needs to call us and go over the details. But it is real and valid. If she is this feisty, we’ll try her out. But if she is playing the victim card and pushing her problems onto everyone else – then her job wouldn’t likely last long.”
It will be interesting to see if Thompson accepts the position and, if she does, whether her efforts will go beyond good attendance.
Be sure to read the comments, two really stand out, “She’s not “a cunning out of the box thinker”, she’s a brat with a sense of entitlement.” And “I know the girl and don’t think it is a wise hire.”
Many said it was a great idea because it will remove the suit from an overloaded court (But what happens if every new grad that doesn’t get hired follows suit?), while others said that Ski Channel should expect a lawsuit if they do fire her.
I’ll keep you posted.
Hat tip to Andrew Gordon, who sent me this irresistible article and the follow-up.
Be sure to see what my buddy Mark Jabo has to say about Trina over at Biz Levity.
Apologies to those of you who expected the interview with KG Charles-Harris, founder of M3, today. The interview will be next week.
Yesterday I offered up links that explored what’s happening currently with the more than 70 million Americans known far and wide as Boomers.
Their effect would have been substantial based on numbers alone, but add in enough attitude to power a rocket to Mars and it has been/still is/will be inescapable.
Still being in a quasi-nostalgic mood this Sunday, I thought I’d share with you the Battle Hymn of the Baby Boomers.
Those of you born after 1964 would do well to accept that the Boomers aren’t going to go away any time soon—nor are they going to sit quietly in a corner until they do.
Today is about the boss, but the reasoning behind the ‘leadership’ advice can be used by anyone.
First is advice from Toddi Gutner in WSJ Online for what to do as an incoming CEO. The advice is well worth reading considering 1,484 CEOs turned over in 2008.
Next a look at CEOs from a different culture and with a different attitude. It’s not that the Japanese do everything right, but American CEOs could certainly use a dose of their humility.
“The greatest challenges were identified as: motivating staff in uncertain times; being able to clearly communicate the rationale for changes; working within a leadership team format rather than alone; and developing staff for redeployment rather than layoffs.”
Finally, two great interviews, one with Starbucks CEO Howard Schultz and the other with Kevin Sharer, chief executive of Amgen. Amazing what you can learn from real pros who produce real value.
Enjoy and I hope that you’ll take a moment to share what you learn from these sources.
Books on leadership, management and associated subjects abound. Jim Stroup has a great post on the dangers of buying into the books written by academics. Jim points out that many academics do do valuable work,
“But when you pick up a book by an academic, look for a sense that the author feels he or she is examining a species of being (you and me) that is not meaningfully self-aware. Such an author may interact with us while conducting research, but will not assign any validity to our own assessments of what we do or why. We are expected to cede that to him (or her), the scholarly expert, whose role it is understand and explain. Ours is merely to learn as best we can, sufficient to be able to comply with the scientific prescription for our suffering – and that with submissiveness and gratitude… Do not let yourself become vulnerable to an academic coup. Keep the scholars in the campus.”
Although I agree that countless academics have taken this approach over the years, I find the attitude not that much different from many of the business “leaders,” consultants, and gurus (self-proclaimed or otherwise) who write how-to and how-I-did-it books.
There are a few gold nuggets in almost everything written, but there are no silver bullets.
And, valuable as it is, reading takes time, so your goal should be to find the highest value for the lowest time/energy cost, which means that reviews and referrals are a good way to go.
consider the source of a referral or review first;
Google the book and read several reviews;
remember that reviewers review through the prism of their own MAP; so
trust your MAP and your reactions to what you hear/read.
Finally, never forget that you don’t have to finish a book you start—I promise that no thunderbolt will strike. If the book is a chore to read it’s unlikely that you will derive enough value to warrant the cost of reading it.
Let’s start with the fact that change isn’t easy and well-managed change is even more difficult.
“CEO s rate their ability to manage change 22 percent lower than their expected need for it — a “change gap” that has nearly tripled since 2006. While the number of companies successfully managing change has increased slightly, the number reporting limited or no success has risen by 60 percent.”
Global competition and the need to address fast moving targets, with Wall Street/your stakeholders demanding immediate results, puts still more pressure on CEOs and the executive team.
But it’s not just about managing change; it’s about creating a desire for it. It’s about creating an environment where changes are being driven by your workers, not just by you and your execs.
How do get your people to want/love/demand change?
A week ago I brought IBM’s The Enterprise of the Future to your attention and said I’d be discussing it in the future, but there’s so much material in the three studies that I decided to make it a Saturday staple for awhile.
Additionally, if you or someone you know, would like to provide a guest post based on or related to any of the three IBM studies (CEO, CFO and HR) I would love to have them.
The first is that to be a powerhouse, no matter your size, you must be “hungry for change,” not scared, tolerant or even willing, but hungry for it.
You must see “change within the organization as a permanent state” and build your culture accordingly.
According to Masao Yamazaki, President and CEO, West Japan Railway Company, “The key to successful transformation is changing our mind-set…it is easy to be complacent…company culture must have a built-in change mechanism.”
While corporate culture is the reason that “employees are comfortable with unpredictability. In an environment in which products, markets, operations and business models are always in flux, values and goals provide alignment and cohesion,”it’s MAP (mindset, attitude, philosophy™) that provides the underpinnings for it all.
And it’s not just organizational change that’s moving so quickly, but positions, including CXOs, are, too.
In an insightful article in MIS Asia, Chris Potts says, “In less than five years’ time, the CIO role, according to CIOs themselves, is destined to become either an executive leader of business change or absorbed into another role,” and walks you through the reasoning and the changes that need to happen.
“There is a pressing need for integrated leadership of business and technology change. With enterprise architecture and investment portfolio management, CIOs have the two strategic tools onto which that leadership depends. The CIO’s cultural challenge is to explain that these tools are primarily about people and collaboration, not technology.”
Change requires talent and a paucity of talent was rated as the greatest barrier to growth, more so than even regulatory and budgetary considerations.
Moreover, the kind of talent needed has changed radically from the descriptions so often heard as has the ways to remunerate them. Now, it’s “people who question assumptions and suggest radical, and what some might initially consider impractical, alternatives” with the potential for “differentiated rewards, such as a stake in the business they helped create.”
Managing this kind of talent takes more than good people skills or charisma, it requires MAP that’s secure and willing to hire people smarter than itself, share a vision of the needed results, turn them loose and trust them to accomplish it.
Yesterday I shared emails from a reader who, at the end of the day, realized that he was over-reacting, his boss was insanely busy and nothing was wrong.
I want to share a series of email with you today because they show up a very important point and apply to employees at all levels. The emails are from ‘Brian’, an 
That’s what Trina Thompson is doing to the tune of $72000; $2000 of which is compensation for the stress engendered by an unsuccessful three month job search; she graduated in April with a bachelor of business administration degree in information technology.
Today is about the boss, but the reasoning behind the ‘leadership’ advice can be used by anyone.
Books on leadership, management and associated subjects abound. Jim Stroup has a 
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