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Miki’s Rules to Live By: Today

Wednesday, September 4th, 2019

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Eleanor-Roosevelt-WH-Portrait.jpg

Does today matter all that much when there’s a tomorrow in the wings?

Yes, no question about it.

Setting aside the fact that tomorrow doesn’t come with a guarantee, what about a more personal take on the idea.

Eleanor Roosevelt summed up the importance perfectly.

“Today is the oldest you’ve ever been, and the youngest you’ll ever be again.”

Probably one of the most important sentences you’ll ever hear.

Don’t forget it — live by it.

Image credit: Wikipedia Commons

What is Wisdom?

Wednesday, August 7th, 2019

https://www.flickr.com/photos/vbcgraffiti/5686625999/

The last two posts were all about wisdom.

What is ‘wisdom’?

Some people are smart;

quick or prompt in action, as persons

having or showing quick intelligence or ready mental capability

some are considered intelligent

having good understanding or a high mental capacity; quick to comprehend, as persons or animals;

very occasionally someone is described as wise

having the power of discerning and judging properly as to what is true or right; possessing discernment, judgment, or discretion.

Wisdom is described as

knowledge of what is true or right coupled with just judgment as to action; sagacity, discernment, or insight.

If you’re still not sure of the difference, all I can say is that you didn’t read the two previous posts carefully enough.

If you want a deeper, more philosophical look at wisdom, check out this post in Psychology Today.

Image credit: VBC17

Wisdom From Kids

Tuesday, August 6th, 2019

I first wrote about Six Words back in 2009 (here and here) and again in 2013 (here).

Six Word was started by Larry Smith after hearing about Earnest Hemingway.

When challenged to tell a story in six words, Ernest Hemingway came up with “For sale. Baby shoes. Never worn.”

I signed up and have since enjoyed all the varied thoughts and ideas offered in just Six Words. More than a million people have contributed their thought6s and ideas..

Last week my email had something special that isn’t online. It came from Larry’s son, Lucas.

From the email.

“I wanted to get involved, so I worked with him to have kids write their best life advice.”

The piece was print only in the special monthly [NYT] kids’ section, but you can read proud dad’s backstory here.

I read The NYT online, but have no access to the print edition.  However, Lukas shared his favorites.

The authors may be young, but you could do a lot worse in life than taking their words to heart.

Both image credits: Six Words

Wise Words Offer Guidance

Wednesday, May 22nd, 2019

https://www.flickr.com/photos/prabakarant/31224945662

Whether you can already say “mea culpa” or are just learning here are some insights that may be of use to you.

Maya Angelou provides truly wise counsel about people.

“I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.”

Speaking of feelings, J.K. Rowling’s words in Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire are a truism that can’t be denied.

“If you want to know what a man’s like, take a good look at how he treats his inferiors, not his equals.”

Bernard M. Baruch was very clear in his belief that what people showed to the world should reflect their true values.

“Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don’t matter, and those who matter don’t mind.”

Oscar Wilde recommended the same more succinctly.

“Be yourself; everyone else is already taken.”

Most interesting to me was Marilyn Monroe’s take.

“I’m selfish, impatient and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I am out of control and at times hard to handle. But if you can’t handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don’t deserve me at my best.”

How true. Nobody’s perfect — or even close — so don’t expect them to be.

Most importantly, when trying to make sense of this world, never forget the words of Albert Einstein.

“Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I’m not sure about the universe.”

Image credit: Prabakaran Thirumalai

Acquiring Wisdom

Wednesday, May 1st, 2019

https://www.flickr.com/photos/132023040@N02/16687996278/

Continuing from yesterday.

Two of the hardest things you need to do to start acquiring wisdom are

  1. Investing the time, energy and discomfort in getting to actually know yourself — the real you that may only exist in private at 3 AM and that you rarely if ever talk about.
  2. Choosing (yes, it’s your choice) to reduce your intake of social media or not, you do need to reduce your reliance on it. At the same time you want to strengthen your objectivity

The absolute requirement of the first is to get to know your opinions, biases, prejudices, etc., sans outside influences. You can’t be objective until you know your subjective viewpoint.

That said, today’s world of distractions, intentionally addictive social media, and extended working hours doesn’t lend itself to self-reflection. That means you need to consciously set aside the time to do it and then follow through — same as any get healthy program.

Developing your objectivity requires you to do some very uncomfortable things, such as reading/listening to material outside your worldview, belief system and comfort zone.

Then researching sources recognized as objective to determine the validity of the information.

You should know that the odds are against your accomplishing this.

Research has shown that no matter how much incontestable proof people rarely change their mind.

But perhaps you can be one of the exceptions.

Image credit: Katherine McGittigan

Ducks in a Row: Wisdom Then and Now

Tuesday, April 30th, 2019

The above image was yesterday’s Oldie from 2009.

What’s changed (or was off in the first place) since then?

Let’s take them one-by-one.

Data: data, since “facts” are often historical and the historical info is often biased.

Information: Think bias and fake news, neither is new, but the quantity has exploded.

Knowledge: Same as original.

Understanding: Too often why or any questioning is asked only if the facts and information run counter to our beliefs, opinion, and worldview.

Wisdom: Unlikely.

Wikipedia describes wisdom as follows:

Wisdom, sapience, or sagacity is the ability to think and act using knowledge, experience, understanding, common sense and insight.[1] Wisdom is associated with attributes such as unbiased judgment, compassion, experiential self-knowledge, self-transcendence and non-attachment,[2] and virtues such as ethics and benevolence.[3][4]

Much of the ability to think according to the above description has been either voluntarily turned over to, or co-opted by, social media.

Considered actions often must pass an “Instagram/Twitter filter;” those that don’t aren’t acted upon.

If there is anything social media can not be blamed for it’s a proliferation of wisdom.

Join me tomorrow for a look at ways and means to acquire wisdom.

Image credit: Nick J Webb

Ducks in a Row: a Secret of Life Success

Tuesday, April 16th, 2019

There’s a lot of advice these days on the best way to live your life.

And it’s well known that one picture is worth a thousand words.

I came across this by accident and thought it was some of the best advice I’d every seen.

https://www.flickr.com/photos/pictoquotes/45255001842/

It really would be hard to do better.

I also suggest starting young, instead of waiting.

Your life will be much happier.

Image credit: BK

Golden Oldies: Quotable Quotes: April Fools Day

Monday, April 1st, 2019

http://www.flickr.com/photos/jonny2love/3405825968/

Poking through 11+ years of posts I find information that’s as useful now as when it was written.

Golden Oldies is a collection of the most relevant and timeless posts during that time.

Wouldn’t it be lovely if we humans could relegate all our foolishness and foibles, both word and deed, to this one day of the year. Instead we tend to spread them across the year and repeat them over and over and over…

All humans are fools at times; some more often than others. Those who claim otherwise are usually found in the ‘more often’ category.

Read other Golden Oldies here.

Can you believe? Q1 is over, done, gone and all we have to show for it is a day especially for fools. So on this day dedicated to fools and foolishness I offer you up some foolish words of wisdom.

Way back in 1894 Mark Twain wrote a book in which the main character, Pudd’nhead Wilson, says, “This is the day upon which we are reminded of what we are on the other three hundred and sixty-four.” A home truth if there ever was one.

If you plan on pulling any pranks today you might want to keep Will Shakespeare’s words in mind, “Better a witty fool than a foolish wit.”

Ben Franklin must have been thinking of politicians when he said Wise men don’t need advice. Fools won’t take it.”

As usual, it’s Will Rogers who nails April Fool’s Day perfectly—not to mention the upcoming elections, “The trouble with practical jokes is that very often they get elected.”

Finally, we can all see the truth in this old Welsh Proverb, “If every fool wore a crown, we should all be kings;” all we have to do is look in the mirror.

I wish you a wonderful day full of pranks, silliness and friends.

Happy April Fools Day!

Flickr image credit: Jonny Hughes

Golden Oldies: How to Handle Disrespect with Class and Confidence

Monday, May 14th, 2018

Poking through 11+ years of posts I find information that’s as useful now as when it was written.

Golden Oldies is a collection of the most relevant and timeless posts during that time.

Coaches, pundits, etc., offer advice on how to handle disrespect, bullying and other negative behavior, some of which is very good. But the approach I like best is summed up in this story of Gandhi and his professor.

The difference between what Gandhi did and what most people do today is that it involved no anger or four letter words; Gandhi used his intelligence to turn the professors own belittling comments against him — and he did it with grace.

Read other Golden Oldies here.

I am frequently asked how to deal with arrogance, disrespect and other antisocial behavior.

Often, the people asking are looking for approaches that echo the classy insults post from 2009.

KG Charles-Harris recently provided a brilliant example of how to handle such comments, with class and amiable good will—although the recipient might not agree.

While I doubt that the following actually happened, that doesn’t change the intelligence and elegance behind the responses.

When Gandhi was studying law at the University College of London, there was a professor, whose last name was Peters, who felt animosity for Gandhi, and because Gandhi never lowered his head towards him, their “arguments” were very common.

One day, Mr. Peters was having lunch at the dining room of the University and Gandhi came along with his tray and sat next to the professor. The professor, in his arrogance, said, “Mr. Gandhi: you do not understand… a pig and a bird do not sit together to eat,” to which Gandhi replies, “You do not worry professor, I’ll fly away ,” and he went and sat at another table.

Mr. Peters, green of rage, decides to take revenge on the next test, but Gandhi responds brilliantly to all questions. Then, Mr. Peters asked him the following question: “Mr Gandhi, if you are walking down the street and find a package, and within it there is a bag of wisdom and another bag with a lot of money; which one will you take?”

Without hesitating, Gandhi responded, “The one with the money, of course.”

Mr. Peters, smiling, said, “I, in your place, would have taken the wisdom, don’t you think?”

“Each one takes what one doesn’t have,” responded Gandhi indifferently.

Mr. Peters, already hysteric, writes on the exam sheet the word “idiot” and gives it to Gandhi. Gandhi takes the exam sheet and sits down.

A few minutes later, Gandhi goes to the professor and says, “Mr. Peters, you signed the sheet, but you did not give me the grade.”

The ‘trick’ is responding to the actual content, rather than the intent or the person, and turning the put-downs back on the speaker.

A good lesson for us all.

Image credit: Okinawa Soba

Golden Oldies: Balance and Common Sense

Monday, February 5th, 2018

https://www.flickr.com/photos/jamesjordan/3423905967

Poking through 11+ years of posts I find information that’s as useful now as when it was written.

Golden Oldies is a collection of the most relevant and timeless posts during that time.

Anyone who reads this blog knows I hold very specific views when it comes to MAP and how people conduct themselves — some would even call me opinionated and I wouldn’t argue. But opinionated or not, I do my best to evaluate based on what is, as opposed to what I wish.

So it was with major regret that I realized this post is no longer what is — at least in Silicon Valley, other startup ecosystems, too many parts of corporate America and large swaths of the public (dis)service, AKA, politicians — it’s what I wish.

And I’m sure others do, too.

Read other Golden Oldies here.

I was reading Oscar de la Renta’s obituary (fascinating guy) and a quote from him caught my eye.

“Being well dressed hasn’t much to do with having good clothes. It’s a question of good balance and good common sense.”

What grabbed me was the second sentence.

Because it doesn’t matter what you set out to do or how much money you spend on accouterments.

It doesn’t matter who you know, where you went to school, how many hours you work or how brilliant your vision.

It doesn’t matter because without balance and common sense you will fail.

Because balance and common sense are the foundation of anything you choose to accomplish.

Flickr image credit: James Jordan

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