Good grief, where did the time go? Thanksgiving is over, and that means the year is close to ending, but first comes the holiday season. Nothing but parties and get-togethers for the next 4.5 weeks.

Frank Ogden said, “Holidays are the greatest learning experience unknown to man.” I think he has a real point, otherwise most of us wouldn’t keep repeating the same actions and activities every year that don’t work for us—isn’t that similar to Einstein’s definition of insanity?

Sadly Philip Andrew Adams hit the nail on the head when he said, “To many people holidays are not voyages of discovery, but a ritual of reassurance.”

Holidays are funny things, rarely does your version of what happened match those of the other people present. But does that matter? Denis Norden said, “It’s like your children talking about holidays, you find they have a quite different memory of it from you. Perhaps everything is not how it is, but how it’s remembered.” How very true, your reality is based on your memories, not someone else’s version of the same event.

Bob Edwards made a very valid observation when he said, “One can always tell when one is getting old and serious by the way that holidays seem to interfere with one’s work.” Based on that I’m still not old, no matter what Social Security says, and I never will be—what about you?

Ben Franklin’s wisdom is accurate as ever, “How many observe Christ’s birthday! How few, his precepts! O! ’tis easier to keep holidays than commandments.” You may not agree, but it seems these days the more vocal the religion the greater the intolerance and hate; I’d rather go back to the days when faith was private and tolerance waxing.

But it’s Pepper Schwartz who sums up the holidays perfectly, “Holidays in general breed unrealistic expectations. The minute you start wondering, ‘is it going to be wonderful enough?,’ it never will be.” The trick, obviously, is not to wonder, just assume. Believe with all your heart; know that it will happen and it will.

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Yesterday was a dream come true—

or maybe a nightmare made just for you.

I hope ’twas the former, but just in case

remember that distance will help erase

the rudeness, the snipes, the downright bad manners

and before next year you can call the enchanters!

Now the turkey is gone, the year, too, almost

and I don’t really feel like doing this post,

so I’ll close with this thought for all my readers—

come back next week for more about leaders:)

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Did you know Thanksgiving is an F day?

There are five Fs that come immediately to mind, they are fun, family, friends, food and football.

Of those five only one comes close to being guaranteed good and that’s food, but even food isn’t a given. There was the year that my host’s two Siamese cats stole the turkey—dragged it off the platter, dropped it to the floor, dragged it across an Aubusson carpet and were on the way out one door when I entered another.

Football often depends on whether your team wins, although a good game, as opposed to a romp, can make the difference.

Friends are often a better bet than family since you can pick and choose, but that only works if you’re the host. One friend always invited two people he knew would ignite—one year it was an Arab and an Israeli just after the Six Day War. Talk about fireworks, more like bombs.

Then, of course, there is family. Family is family and blood may be thicker than water, but that doesn’t mean putting the family together in one room will always generate sweetness and light—too often there is a large dose of vinegar and sour grapes. It’s said that leopards don’t change their spots and neither do family members. If they are difficult or you can’t stand them 364 days of the years, they won’t change for the 365^th day.

Fun depends either on the first four or your ability to take a step back and laugh—at the food, the game, your friends, your family and, most of all, yourself.

Laughter is the balm that soothes a holiday rash; apply liberally and often.

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I’m a bit ambivalent about Thanksgiving along with many other holidays, such as Mother’s Day. While I understand and even agree with the idea of honoring a certain attitude, it seems hypocritical when the attitude exists only on that day.

Sadly, many of the people most vocal about a holiday are the same people whose actions during the rest of the year belie their holiday attitudes.

That said, here are my suggestions regarding Thanksgiving.

No matter how bad things are in your corner of the world give thanks that you are alive to read this. As long as you’re breathing you have a shot at changing your circumstances or improving someone else’s.

Several years ago I had a terminally ill friend. Her final Thanksgiving act was to sign papers consigning all her useable body parts to an organ donor program; she died just a few days later.

Her action infuriated her family, but she had made sure they couldn’t stop her choice. She died knowing that others would live because of that choice.

Which brings us to my second suggestion.

Remember the words of Plato, “Always be kind, for everyone is fighting a hard battle,” and follow the advice of Anne Herbert, “Practice random kindness and senseless acts of beauty” every day.

Get in the habit of doing one small, unplanned thing every day—drop a quarter in an about-to-expire meter; pick up a piece of litter; help someone across the street.

Just think of the difference in our world if everyone did just one random act every day.

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Now click to see what to avoid tomorrow

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(And a special link to stories of Thanksgivings past, so you’ll know it’s not just your family or to light a candle that yours is different:)

And click to see some great turkey PR

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Jim Gordon shares his own view of the world here every Sunday. Today is the first of three holiday specials sure to tickle your funny bone and add to your fun. See all mY generation posts here.

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I’m a bit ambivalent about Thanksgiving along with many other holidays, such as Mother’s Day. While I understand and even agree with the idea of honoring a certain attitude, it seems hypocritical when it’s done only on that day.

Sadly, many of the people most vocal about a holiday are the same people whose actions during the rest of the year belie their holiday attitudes.

That said, here are my suggestions regarding Thanksgiving.

No matter how bad things are in your corner of the world give thanks that you are alive to read this. As long as you’re breathing you have a shot at changing your circumstances or improving someone else’s. Several years ago I had a terminally ill friend. Her final Thanksgiving act was to sign papers consigning all her useable body parts to an organ donor program; She died just a few days later. Her action infuriated her family, but she had made sure they couldn’t stop her choice.

Which brings us to my second suggestion.

Remember the words of Plato, “Always be kind, for everyone is fighting a hard battle,” and follow the advice of Anne Herbert, “Practice random kindness and senseless acts of beauty” daily.

Get in the habit of doing one small, unplanned thing every day—drop a quarter in an about-to-expire meter; pick up a piece of litter; help someone across the street. Just think of the difference if everyone did just one random act every day.

And courtesy of the Internet comes just the right thought to round out this post,

May your stuffing be tasty
May your turkey plump,
May your potatoes and gravy
Have never a lump.
May your yams be delicious
And your pies take the prize,
And may your Thanksgiving dinner
Stay off your thighs!

Happy Thanksgiving Everyone—be sure not to farctate on the farcing today!

PS Enjoy a Thanksgiving special edition of mY generation, Thanks, But No Thanks…giving.

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