Poking through 14+ years of posts I find information that’s as useful now as when it was written.

Golden Oldies is a collection of the most relevant and timeless posts during that time.

I was reminded of this article after reading one by Wally Bock that I will share tomorrow. I’ve always found it interesting that certain words, such as influence, are assumed positive, while manipulation is negative.

Read other Golden Oldies here.

There is a dangerous assumption out there that ‘leaders’ are chuck full of positive traits and on the side of the angels, but I’m here to tell you that it ain’t necessarily so. Just as leaders come in all shapes, colors and sizes they come with a wide variety of traits, not all of them positive. But it seems as if succession is tough all over.

Italian police have caught the Sicilian Mafia’s number two, the latest in a string of top-level arrests that has given the crime group that once terrified Italy problems with rebuilding its leadership.

The hero CEO who will save the company easily morphs into the imperial CEO. An intelligent, thoughtful opinion piece by Ho Kwon Ping in Singapore considers the dangers of this happening and assumes it will continue in the US—and it probably will.

The leadership of any company is critical to the success of its mission — but no one individual is mission-critical.

Yesterday I wrote Real Leaders are Fair, which means applying rules equally, but that rarely happens, especially when a government is involved and ours is no different. Consider the non-application of a federal law backed by a presidential proclamation that prohibits corrupt foreign officials and their families from receiving American visas. But business interests always seem to trump fairness.

“Of course it’s because of oil,” said John Bennett, the United States ambassador to Equatorial Guinea from 1991 to 1994, adding that Washington has turned a blind eye to the Obiangs’ corruption and repression because of its dependence on the country for natural resources. He noted that officials of Zimbabwe are barred from the United States.

Finally, on a lighter note, I found the answer given by Ask the Coach to this question to be classic.

Q: I am having a difficult time leading my team. The team members will not follow my instructions, which I am sure would make our project much more successful. What am I doing wrong?

A: What you’re doing wrong is very simple: you have simply forgotten that your team is more critical to the success of your project than you are.

Take a moment and read the whole post, I guarantee you’ll like what you learn.

And if you want more of my picks you’ll find them here.

A Friday series exploring Startups and the people who make them go. Read all If the Shoe Fits posts here

Years ago I wrote a post for a leadership blog about coping and based on the questions I’m hearing and the discussions I’m involved in it’s time to re-post it.

“Life is not what it’s supposed to be. It’s what it is. The way you cope with it is what makes the difference.”
–Virginia Satir

Smart lady, Virginia.

That thought, or any variation thereof, is probably the single most important concept people need to wrap their heads around.

Neither vehement denial nor passionate pleas will change what is; what matters is what you choose to do.

Positional leaders and those who claim the leadership label are often more into pleas and denial than they are into coping.

Understandable, since it’s much easier to rail or whine than to get off the proverbial ass and do something.

But that is exactly what leading requires and leading yourself is the most important leadership job you will ever have, because if you can’t lead yourself you will never have the opportunity to lead others.

Coping isn’t about playing ostrich or ignoring something and hoping it will go away.

Coping doesn’t involve ideology and rhetoric.

Coping doesn’t always mean solving the problem or overcoming the challenge.

Coping isn’t about being a hero or going it alone.

Coping rarely yields a perfect or even a complete fix.

While founders are less into obvious pleas and denial, they tend instead to superhuman efforts and projecting a ‘we can overcome anything’ persona.

They would do better to embrace the final description of what coping truly is.

Coping means facing whatever it is head on, recognizing it in its entirety, figuring out how best to deal with it, and then doing what needs to be done—all while accepting the reality and limitations of what is possible.

Image credit: HikingArtist

As Sharlyn Lauby, our August Carnival host, points out, we’re already a third of the way through third quarter! My, how time flies when you’re having fun—or fighting fires.

Along with the great posts this month, she queried everybody for their book recommendations, especially useful to the heavy travelers among you or those who just prefer curated reading lists. So without any more blathering on my part here is the carnival. Enjoy!

Joel Garfinkle, author of Career Advancement Blog, shared the story of a manager overcoming being passed over for a promotion in “How to Get a Promotion After Being Rejected”

And he spent his summer promoting his new book “Getting Ahead: Three Steps to Take Your Career to the Next Level” – congrats!

Changing Winds blog by Jim Taggert submitted “Real Leaders Don’t Have the Attention Spans of Squirrels”

On his summer reading list was “A Thousand Farewells: A Reporter’s Journey from Refugee Camp the the Arab Spring” by CBC journalist Nahlah Ayed

At the Driving Results Through Culture blog, S. Chris Edmonds utilizes the recent sanctions against Penn State to start a discussion about “Gauging Your Organization’s Integrity”

He’s reading Mark Levy’s “Accidental Genius: Using Writing to Generate Your Best Ideas, Insight, and Content” – and says, it’s well…genius.

Anne Perschel at Germane Insights discusses “Killer CEO Character Traits and How to Find Them”

Her summer reading suggestion? “The Dovekeepers” by Alice Hoffman

Great Leadership by Dan McCarthy published “10 Simple ‘Truths’ about Management vs. Leadership”

His summer reading list included Robert B. Parker’s “Lullaby” written by Ace Atkins

Horizon Point blog discusses the need for leaders to have expertise in the post “The Es of Leadership”

Mark Stelzner at Inflexion Advisors tells us “10 (Avoidable) Ways to Lose an HR RFP”

He cranked through two excellent novels by Gillian Flynn – “Sharp Objects” and “Dark Places”

Jesse Lyn Stoner communicates “How to Identify Your Team or Organization’s Purpose”

And she just finished “Buddha’s Brain” The Practical Neuroscience of Happiness, Love, and Wisdom” by Rick Hanson

David Burkus at LDRLB penned “Celebrity Leaders May Actually Be Falling Stars”

The best read of his summer was Cynthia Montgomery’s “The Strategist: Be the Leader Your Business Needs”

LeadBIG blog’s Jane Perdue tells us it’s okay to throw some spaghetti in her post “In praise of mad genius”

Her must read is “Leading with Kindness: How Good People Consistently Get Superior Results” by William Baker and Michael O’Malley

Mike Henry at Lead Change Group shared a post written by David M. Dye on the “7 Practical Questions that will Multiply Your Influence”

He recommends reading “The Advantage: Why Organizational Health Trumps Everything Else in Business” by Patrick Lencioni followed closely by “Great By Choice: Uncertainty, Chaos, and Luck – Why Some Thrive Despite Them All” by Jim Collins and Morten T. Hansen

Leading with Trust by Randy Conley asks the question “Are You a Good Boss or a Bad Boss? 8 Ways to Tell”

His good book this summer was “One Big Thing: Discovering What You Were Born to Do” by Phil Cooke

Management Excellence by Art Petty shares with us “The Hard Work of Getting Better at What You Do”

His book recommendation: “Do Nothing: How to Stop Overmanaging and Become a Great Leader” by J. Keith Murninghan

Management is a Journey blog, written by Robert Tanner, talks about the “Three Questions Senior Leaders Must Ask Before Undertaking Organizational Change”

MAPping Company Success talks about extremes in “Hate, Intolerance and Responsibility”

Miki recommends “Screw Business as Usual” by Richard Branson

Tim Milburn shares the lessons he’s learned in “3 Things Putting a Golf Ball Taught Me about Decision-Making”

And he read “Stillpower: Excellence with Ease in Sports and Life” by Garret Kramer

Bernd Geropp at More Leadership blog tells us “What you ought to know about performance based bonus”

He just finished “Fascinate: Your 7 Triggers to Persuasion and Captivation” from Sally Hogshead

Anna Farmery, author of The Engaging Brand, outlines the “5 Trends Driving Social Business”

Her good read of the summer is “Infinite Possibility: Creating Customer Value on the Digital Frontier” by B. Joseph Pine

Jennifer V. Miller at The People Equation discusses integrity in her post “4 Filters Your Team Uses to Gauge Trust”

Her summer reads included Michael Hyatt’s “Platform: Get Noticed in a Noisy World”

Three Star Leadership by Wally Bock teaches us “Lessons from Sam Walton as WalMart turns 50”

And last but certainly not least, Lisa Kohn tells us “5 surprising reason why you shouldn’t be so nice” at The Thoughtful Leaders Blog.

Image credit: Great Leadership

The thing she [behavioral psychologist] taught me—and this sounds obvious—is that behavior is a function of consequence.  We had to change the behavior in the organization so that people felt safe to bring bad news. And I looked in the mirror, and I realized I was part of the problem.  I didn’t want to hear the bad news, either. So I had to change how I behaved, and start to thank people for bringing me bad news. —Joseph Jimenez, chief executive of Novartis

The behavioral psychologist was brought in after a consulting group was paid to provide “better, more robust process, with more analytics,” which changed nothing.

When we started RampUp Solutions in 1999, we spent a good deal of effort coming up with a tag line that easily explained the services we provide.

After several iterations we finally settled on “To change what they do change how you think”

Over the years, I’ve heard and read story after story of how all kinds of changes—from turn arounds to improved productivity to retention—all started with a change in the way the boss thought.

And that applied whether the boss was CEO, team leader or somewhere in-between.

Stories and discussions about change tend to focus on the actions that bring about the changes, instead of starting at the beginning with the hardest work,

Work that requires the boss, at whatever level, changing the way she thinks and then dispersing and embedding those changes throughout her organization.

So before you hire expensive consultants or seek help from advisors look in the mirror to determine how much of the problem is you.

Flickr image credit: manymeez

There are three functions required to live in the 21^st Century—no matter your country or circumstances.

Whether you choose to live loudly, taking risks and seizing every opportunity, or just move through life with minimum effort every person living leads, manages, and sells every day of their lives.

And I do mean everyone, from the very top—heads of state, financial barons and CEOs to everyday people and the homeless.

Look at each from a functional point of view.

Lead means “to go before or with to show the way” and you probably do that at least 50% of the time in your daily life, even when you only lead yourself.

Manage means “to be in charge.” You can be in charge of various things or various people at various times, but you are always in charge of yourself.

Sell means “to persuade or induce someone to do something” which is what you do when choosing a movie, putting your kids to bed or convincing your boss about X.

After a years of reading and watching myself and others I find that these three functions, in their broadest sense, seem to embrace everything we humans do.

What do you think? Did I miss anything?

Flickr image credit: http://www.flickr.com/photos/aussiegall/759309122/

A few months ago The Conference Board published a study that showed that US workers were more dissatisfied now than at any time in the previous 20 years. James Heskett, Baker Foundation Professor, Emeritus, at Harvard Business School, used that study as part of the basis for a discussion about the growing dissatisfaction. Heskett poses intriguing ideas, but the greater value is in the comments he draws from his audience.

Speaking of American workers, do you know what their favorite new TV show is? A show that is a giant hit with young viewers and even beats Desperate Housewives? It’s Undercover Boss and I highly recommend it. Tomorrow is the season finale (I think) and it should be good. The company is 1-800-Flowers and according to the blurb the boss gets outed.

Next a little insight that could increase job satisfaction. Do you pride yourself on your poker face or are your emotions as obvious as a TV show? Or do you censor some and share the others? Research has proven that facial expressions are important to social interaction and current studies of people with facial paralysis offers some great insights for the rest of us.

Finally, some fascinating studies back up the premise discussed in Even Among Animals: Leaders, Followers and Schmoozers. Interesting reading and even better dinner conversation.

Enjoy!

Image credit: pedroCarvalho on flickr

My thanks to Mark Bennett over at TalentedApps for hosting the February Leadership Carnival.

Don’t be put off by the title; the posts cover a wide range of issues beyond the classic idea of positional leadership.

You’ll find posts on leadership, how-to’s from a coach, management development and more from all your favorite bloggers and the opportunity to discover new ones.

Enjoy!

Dan McCarthy presents What Prevents Leaders from “Connecting the Dots”?, posted at Great Leadership, explaining how in addition to the multitude of external factors that impact our ability to connect the dots, there is also something inside each of us that needs attention too.

Bret L. Simmons presents I Am Responsible For My Success and Failures And For Continuing To Learn From Them, posted at Bret L. Simmons, discussing an important principle in leading a truly empowered life.

Art Petty presents Team Stuck in the Creativity Deep Freeze? Try “Why Not?” to Start the Thaw posted at Management Excellence, providing suggestions for “waking the creative giant hiding inside your people and your teams.”

Becky Robinson presents Todd Pittinsky and Intergroup Leadership posted at Mountain State University LeaderTalk, describing intriguing ways to “increase positive interactions between different subgroups in your organization.”

Miki Saxon presents When Realities Collide posted at MAPping Company Success, which considers the difficulties in engaging the ‘just in time workforce’ to which many companies are moving and asks “how do you get people to care when they know without a doubt that the company doesn’t care about them?”

Coaching Category –

Shawn M. Driscoll presents 4 Simple Steps to Go Signature posted at Shawn Driscoll, providing tips to coaches for reaching a broader audience.

Executive Development Category –

Wally Bock presents Becoming a Great Leader is Up to You posted at Three Star Leadership Blog, saying, “If you want to become a great leader, you have to take responsibility for your own development. Here are some tools you can use.”

Mike King presents 100 Ways to Serve Others posted at Learn This, saying, “Leadership development requires an attitude of service to others. There are 100 ways to serve.”

Leadership Category –

John Agno presents Top 10 Leadership Tips of the Last Decade posted at Coaching Tip: The Leadership Blog, saying, “Here are ten popular leadership lessons learned over the last several years and recommended by John Agno at CoachingTip.com”

Dean L. Forbes presents How to Achieve Your Goals posted at Dean L. Forbes – Powerful Principles of Personal Growth, providing tips for what to do once you’ve set your goals.

Bob Lieberman presents Our Debt To Adolescents posted at Cultivating Creativity – Developing Leaders for the Creative Economy, discussing some interesting coping strategies tapped from younger folks.

Jane Perdue presents Perfectly Matched Or Delightfully Oddball? posted at Life, Love & Leadership, challenging the assumption that all the people in your personal and work circles must be a perfect fit.

Aaron Windeler presents Why a leader with a bad mood can be good for business posted at Scientific Management, discussing evidence that shows us we should consider how our moods affect our followers.

Tom Glover presents Should Leaders Focus on Each Individual Follower? posted at Reflection Leadership, whether leaders should move followers in and out of their “in-group.”

Mike Henry Sr. presents Sources of Leadership posted at Lead Change Group Blog, asking, “What is the source of your leadership authority?”

Anne Perschel presents Why We Love Twitter – What Leaders Should Know posted at Germane Insights, recommending we “create a company-wide private Twitter to achieve desired actions and attitudes.”

Tanmay Vora presents On Leadership, Opening Up and Being Prepared posted at QAspire – Quality, Management, Leadership & Life!, urging us to “stay current, open and receptive to new insights.”

Nick McCormick presents Fill Your Pack posted at Joe and Wanda – on Management, providing a ten-minute Management Tips Podcast with Tim Clark, author of “The Leadership Test.”

Nissim Ziv presents What is the Difference between Management and Leadership posted at Job Interview Guide, saying, “There are many models that depict leadership and management in the business world. In reality management and leadership have very different meanings: a manager is a title and leader is a function. Management is a position and leadership is a skill.”

David Burkus presents Book Review: Leadership & The One Minute Manager posted at davidburkus.com, reviewing a classic book that teaches situational leadership theory.

Erin Schreyer presents To Be or Not to Be? posted at Authentic Leadership, talking about the benefits of being intentional.

Ralph Jean-Paul presents The Persuasion Experiment: 5 Effective Persuasion Techniques Tested posted at Potential 2 Success, saying, “We are constantly trying to persuade others in one direction or another. Whether it is trying to convince your friends to eat at one restaurant instead of another, or getting your boss to give you a raise, being able to persuade other people is important. Leaders must have this skill! In this post, I test 5 persuasion techniques to see if they really work.”

Jennifer V. Miller presents Stepping Into the Abyss posted at Jennifer V. Miller, describing the key factors necessary for employees to feel comfortable giving feedback to their bosses.

William Matthies presents Change: The New You posted at Business Wisdom: Words to Manage By, saying, “If you can’t lead change, it will lead you.”

Eric Pennington presents One Question For Your CEO posted at Epic Living – Leadership Development Career Management Training Executive Life Coaching Author, discussing “maybe the most important question for the CEO, and those who follow him or her.”

Erik Samdahl presents 20 Years and Counting: Leadership Development Once Again the Most Critical Issue Facing Organizations in 2010 posted at Productivity Blog, saying, “Based on a study of over 40 issues, leadership development is the most critical issue: what companies see as important but not effective.”

Lisa Rosendahl presents Have You Checked Your Credibility Lately? posted at Lisa Rosendahl, saying, “You have credibility currency. You trade in it and on it regularly, whether you are aware of it or not. Have you checked your credibility lately?”

Alice Snell presents Seats at Executive Tables posted at Taleo Blog – Talent Management Solutions, saying, “HR needs more Seats at Executive Tables”

Steve Roesler presents How To Get Your Good Ideas Heard posted at All Things Workplace, saying, “Leaders are always looking for other leaders. One way they find them is by watching people who know the importance of getting their ideas heard. Here are some ways to do just that.”

Jon Ingham presents Work sucks, play games! posted at Management 2.0 developing social capital, discussing ideas from a book which suggests using games and virtual worlds to change the way we work.

Tom Magness presents Spider-Senses posted at Leader Business, saying, “Good leaders need ‘Spider-senses.’ The power that comes from listening to that inner voice, from following up on intuition, can save a reputation, a project, or even a life. Take a few lessons from the world’s greatest ‘Webslinger!’”

Management Category –

Barry Zweibel presents The Heart of Effective Personal Management posted at GottaGettaBLOG!, a primer on Stephen Covey’s “Time Management Matrix” from The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People.

Laura, a.k.a. working girl presents Working Girls posted at Working Girl, discussing an increasing source of frustration for working women who want to work more effectively.

Sharlyn Lauby presents Anonymous Comments posted at hr bartender, saying, “Managers should ask questions to get better answers and build trust.”

Jim Stroup presents The Management Uncertainty Principle posted at Managing Leadership, saying, “Uncertainty operates not just in physics but in management as well. How can you use it to gain greater control over your work?”

Image credit: Great Leadership

Often

• Leaders can envision and inspire, but that doesn’t mean they can manage.
• Managers can motivate and lead, but that doesn’t make them visionaries.
• Visionaries can inspire, but not necessarily lead or manage.

Rarely can one person do it all and that’s OK—if…

The solution starts when you shove your ego in your back pocket and face facts.

And it’s the same at every management level, be it Microsoft or McDonald’s.

Once you accept that reality then you can move forward and

• relinquish power;
• hire those who compliment your skills;
• give them the correct title, authority and status;
• shower them with public and private recognition;
• valid compensation; and
• sincere appreciation.

Of course, the problem with this is that few will admit their deficiencies even to themselves.

Worse, even if you want to admit it, companies, bosses and peer pressure make it almost impossible.

That leaves you with two choices.

• Stiffen your spine, ignore the pressure and let the results speak for your success.
• Bow to the pressure, fake it for as long as you can and change companies before you are found out.

That’s the great thing about life—you always have a choice.

Image credit: Svadilfari on flickr

Monday I wrote that so-called leadership skills are actually the skills everyone needs to live a satisfying life and to that end they are well worth developing.

I also said I would share the most important trait of leadership—and life.

It’s Initiative.

Initiative is the number one key leadership ingredient.

More so than vision or influence, it’s initiative that puts you in the forefront of any action, large of small.

Initiative is what

• separates the doers from the observers;
• stokes creativity and innovation;
• drives entrepreneurial activity at all levels; and
• makes the world a better place.

Initiative isn’t about schooling, although education can enhance it; it’s not about birth or clothes or cool. It’s not about networking or connections or followers on Twitter.

It’s about awareness; about noticing what needs to be done and doing it whether or not anybody is around to notice; doing it whether or not there is credit and kudos.

Initiative doesn’t wait for someone else to lead the way, nor does it play Monday morning quarterback to initiative taken by others, instead it actively contributes to that initiative.

Initiative doesn’t wait to occupy a certain position before becoming active, preferring to constantly seek ways in which it can contribute.

I believe that initiative is latent in every person, but it’s up to each individual to make it active.

Image credit: business mans on sxc.hu

There are three universal functions that people at all levels do in the course of daily life and I bet that you can’t guess them.

Every day, no matter who you are or what you do you lead, manage and sell.

Most people don’t believe me when I say this.

Workers think they don’t lead or manage because they’re workers and non-salespeople, especially engineers, are usually adamant that they not only don’t, but couldn’t, sell.

The point is that these three functions have been swathed in enough mystiques that most people believe they don’t do them when, in fact, they do them daily.

You sell every time you convince someone to do what you want them to do.

You lead every time you take the initiative instead of waiting for someone else to do it.

But people hesitate to use words such as sales, manage or lead to describe what they do unless they’re in that profession or already at a certain level in the organization and that holds them back from growing.

We humans have a habit of assigning value to acts based to a great degree on the language used to describe them.

I’m not suggesting that you use this language for bragging rights, but you should use it inside your head when you think about what you do.

For instance, if you’re an engineer who, after thoroughly researching the subject, presents a compelling argument to your boss for buying a new piece of software or equipment and it is purchased as a result, then you sold your argument.

The same is true when your idea of where to have lunch or which movie to see is chosen—you sold it.

Or you’re the junior member of the team, but you take the initiative to research something that you think will contribute to the success of the project even though it’s not your responsibility, then you’re leading.

When it comes to managing most people realize that to get anything done anywhere in their life requires various management skills, but they rarely call it that.

But if you want to grow that’s exactly what you need to do.

Examine what you do every day, including the little things, and acknowledge each time you led, sold or managed and then use the correct language when thinking about it.

It’s what’s in your head, what you believe, that’s important, because no matter what others say, if you don’t think it you won’t believe them.

Image credit: flickr