Fight the Right Way to Win
by Miki Saxon
A couple of months ago I wrote two posts, Ducks in a Row: Respect vs Nice and Ducks in a Row: Respect Does Not Mean Agreement.
Yesterday I had some feedback from a senior exec who said that while he agreed in principle, he wouldn’t try to apply it to his team. He went on to say that his team was so diverse, consisting of recognized experts from different disciplines, that they had only two things in common.
The first was the size of their egos; and the second the desire to solve the problem — their way.
I asked if he had even tried any of the idea in the linked articles.
He said no; he’d been down that road in the past and the cost in time and energy was too high.
I asked if he would reconsider if I could show him a team that made his look like easy, with egos that dwarfed theirs.
He laughed and sure, so I showed him.
The team is made up of politicians from all parties, government officials, corporate CEOs, trade unionists, clergy, journalists, academics, and activists.
That got his attention, as did the task they were brought together to address, because it is not only larger, but far more intractable.
…top Mexican leaders who are working together on a project called Méxicos Posibles (Possible Mexicos) to develop solutions to their country’s daunting problems of illegality, insecurity, and inequity.
Since I knew he was listening I told him one more thing; maybe the hardest one for him to accept — that his ego was similarly sized and his own belief in his ability to make it work was no different than any member of his team.
I told him brute force wasn’t going to cut it and that he didn’t have to do it alone.
Méxicos Posibles used a consultancy led by Adam Kahane, author of Collaborating with the Enemy: How to Work with People You Don’t Agree with or Like or Trust.
I suggested he start with that book and other resources linked in my post.
I reminded him he has the stature to reach out to people like Kahane and get a response.
Hopefully I got through; I’ll know in a few weeks what direction he chooses and will let you know.
Image credit: Hiking Artist
