YouTube credit: AishVideo

If she is looking over your shoulder at a room full of potentially more interesting people, she is ill-mannered. If, however, she is not looking over your shoulder, but into a smartphone in her hand, she is not only well within modern social norms, but is also a wired, well-put-together person.

Obviously, I’m not well-put-together.

Meet me and you’ll know instantly that I am the proud possessor of antique manners, as opposed to the digital kind.

• I pay attention to people while talking with them, as opposed to scanning the room for someone more interesting, i.e., useful.
• I really listen to what they are saying.
• I don’t text as we talk.
• I don’t check email, make dinner reservations, surf, etc. during our conversation.

This is as true when I talk on the phone as when I attend a networking event or social function.

The body of brain research that proves the only thing multitasking achieves is to make you incompetent grows daily.

It’s just not how our brains were built.

My ‘old-fashion’ focus has many benefits chief of which is people remember me weeks, months and even years later when all we had was a 30 second conversation.

Think about it.

When was the last time that someone gave you their completely undivided attention for 30 seconds or longer?

When was the last time you gave someone yours?

Fickr image credit: http://www.flickr.com/photos/zedbee/103147140/

Over the years I have spent countless content inches advising that all efforts stem from MAP, and just how critical it is for you to know your own.

I’ve also said that it is MAP that enables or prevents people from implementing what they learn and the advice they receive, no matter the source; I’ve talked about the advantages of managing MAP or actively changing it .

And over the years I’ve received the occasional email and phone call explaining to me why I’m full of it and my MAP approach is garbage—only in more robust terms.

So imagine my delight when I read What’s The Most Difficult CEO Skill? Managing Your Own Psychology by Ben Horowitz, general partner at VC firm Andreessen Horowitz.

It’s a great read about a subject that is typically taboo, but one that impacts most people, even though they aren’t CEOs.

The great advantage most of us have is there’s always someone to blame, whether at work or in our personal life, by saying ‘I did my part’.

Instead, tweak Horowitz’s four points to calm and focus yourself

• Make some friends –There is much talk today about “building community;” people have hundreds, if not thousands, of “friends,” but social networks don’t lend themselves to serious discussions and advice about actions needed or mental anguish calmed.
• Get it out of your head and onto paper – I’ve always been a big promoter of writing it down and divorcing it from your psyche. Writing it down is a kind of personal Sunshine Law that helps you to see things much more clearly.
• Focus on the road not the wall – For better or worse we all follow our thoughts; focus on the path to your destination and you’ll get there—focus on the roadblocks and you’ll hit them.
• Don’t quit! When you are tired and hurting it’s so much easier to reduce the goal or just plain give up, but doing so will come back and bite you faster and harder than doing the best you can—even if you fall a bit short.

Image credit: http://www.warninglabelgenerator.com

See all mY generation posts here.

I’ve always liked advice columns, as much for the duh factor of those writing as for the level of common sense they often display. These days I read Carolyn Hax, but when I was young the reigning queens were a pair of twin sisters, Eppie Lederer, writing as Ann Landers, and Pauline Phillips, writing as Dear Abby, AKA, Abigail Van Buren. Today we’ll take a look at Landers in conjunction with the business world; next week her sister.

Let’s start with some great advice on dealing with the irritating elements found in every workplace—usually  people, “There are really only three types of people: those who make things happen, those who watch things happen, and those who say, “What happened?””

And moving on to how to deal with them, “Nobody says you must laugh, but a sense of humor can help you overlook the unattractive, tolerate the unpleasant, cope with the unexpected, and smile through the day.”

Networking is a necessity of business life and Landers offers up a golden rule for doing it. “The true measure of a man is how he treats someone who can do him absolutely no good.” Take this to heart and watch your networking ROI skyrocket.

Here are three pieces of golden advice, whether you are building a career in the corporate world or as an entrepreneur.

1. “Nobody gets to live life backward. Look ahead, that is where your future lies.”
2. “Opportunities are usually disguised as hard work, so most people don’t recognize them.”
3. “Know when to tune out, if you listen to too much advice you may wind up making other peoples mistakes.”

And some personal advice that I hope you never forget,“The naked truth is always better than the best dressed lie”

In a world where ego and self-focus has run amok, Lander’s uses humor to remind people to reign in their egos.

She reminds us of the importance of looking in the mirror first, instead of assuming the problem is someone else, “One out of four people in this country is mentally unbalanced. Think of your three closes friends; if they seem OK, then you’re the one.”

And I’m pretty sure her final thought is just as applicable if you don’t have a dog, “Don’t accept your dog’s admiration as conclusive evidence that you are wonderful.”

Image credit: Wikimedia

It’s raining where I live. It’s been raining for weeks (months?); not all day but on and off most days. In case your weather is similarly unappealing you can enjoy the day reading some very interesting stuff. And if the sun is shining you can still enjoy this week’s offerings with your morning coffee.

A couple of weeks ago I gave you a link to a story explaining how GE and other corporate titans not only pay little-to-no tax, but actually get money back. But even more fascinating is learning how the wealthy, the ones whose taxes Congress keeps cutting, avoid paying taxes, too.

Ten years, not much in the life of a person, but it’s forever in the online world. 2011 is Wikipedia’s 10^th birthday Business Week offers up a great in depth article on where it’s been, where it’s going and the woman leading it.

Creativity is on every manager’s mind and McKinsey offers up some good ideas on how to ignite it. Being McKinsey they aim the info at executives, but with minor tweaking any manager can use the ideas.

Creativity is not a trait reserved for the lucky few. By immersing your people in unexpected environments, confronting ingrained orthodoxies, using analogies, and challenging your organization to overcome difficult constraints, you can dramatically boost their creative output—and your own.

Speaking of creativity… Have you ever wondered how the dinosaurs had sex? Considering their size it must have taken a lot of ingenuity to go all the way; Slate offers up some answers.

That’s it for this Saturday; rain or shine have a wonderful weekend.

Image credit: MykReeve on flickr

“Joe” called me today. He said he was thinking of leaving his company not because he wanted to, but because everyone thought he should.

He explained that everyone who knew him kept showing him articles and telling him that he was a born entrepreneur and should start his own company.

Joe said he had worked for everything from large companies to startups and as long as he had a good manager and liked the culture he was happy. He worked hard and felt he was fairly compensated.

Joe said he had discussed it with his family and they said he should do what made him happy and they would support that decision.

However, he didn’t want to end up looking like a loser because he didn’t do it.

Boiled down, here is my response.

• Contrary to current media coverage people who work for companies are not losers and entrepreneurs are not the be all and end all of success.
• Few, if any, knowledge workers at any level work 8-hour days, disconnect and go home.
• In the current recession, entrepreneurs are to the 21^st Century what consultants were to the recessions of the 20^th Century.
• Having entrepreneurial MAP does not mean you want or have to be an entrepreneur.

The last point is especially important.

I saw yet another list of 10 traits entrepreneurs and I had to chuckle. Here it is

1. They Are Not Stopped by Fear
2. They Know When to Ask for Help
3. They Are Persistent
4. They Are Passionate About Their Businesses
5. They Are Willing to Market and Sell
6. They Know Their Numbers
7. They’re Disciplined
8. They Have Integrity
9. They’re Great Communicators
10. They Think Long-Term

I chuckled because these are the same traits that all good people have when adjusted for their position and experience.

They are also the traits that the best managers look for when they are hiring. There are, however, many mangers too insecure to appreciate them.

Many years ago I read an article about the guy who invented the tiles used on the Challenger spacecraft to protect it when it reentered the atmosphere. He wasn’t an entrepreneur, he was a Lockheed engineer. He didn’t get a bonus for his work, it was his job. He didn’t care; he was happy at his company, was proud of what he did and liked being part of something larger. He was a winner.

The lesson here is that great people work for existing companies and great people start companies and both win.

Joe is a winner.

The losers are those who disparage other people’s choice.

Image credit: http://www.flickr.com/photos/chokingsun/3473500703/

Longtime readers are familiar with my thoughts (rants?) on the prevalence of the entitled mentality in Millennials and its spread to other generations, including the older ones that should know better by now. (If you missed them search “entitled.”)

With that in mind, you’ll understand why a blog post entitled Entitlement vs. Entrepreneurship caught my eye.

The best and possibly only cure for this mentality is to start your own business. You quickly realize that the world doesn’t guarantee you a desk, computer, bad coffee, and a base salary. As an entrepreneur, you don’t start with a golden egg, you go and create it. It’s hard to feel entitled when you don’t have anything.

If the entitled mindset really does change as a result of the Great Recession it might be enough to consider it a silver lining, albeit a sheer one.

Image credit: http://www.flickr.com/photos/arvindgrover/3219533760/

Image credit: Wikimedia

From an article about Tony Hsieh,

Although his admirers credit Mr. Hsieh with having created a unique (and unified) culture at Zappos, others point out that what he is doing is actually simple, and perhaps not so original.

I’d like to know who those ‘others’ are.

The best things usually are simple, have often been done before and I don’t think Hsieh has ever claimed his ideas and approach were new—but his execution is.

His approach is simple: happy employees make for happy customers; happy customers spend lots of money and return often.

Of course, if it’s so simple why don’t all CEOs and other bosses run their own organizations that way? Why do they pay $4000 to learn from him? Because the proof is in the Zappos pudding.

I’ll bet that Jack Welch never cared if the people who worked at GE were happy as long as they made their numbers—in fact, I’ll guarantee that no imperial CEO gave or gives a damn; nor do similarly minded managers at other levels.

Hsieh is more proof that great CEOs aren’t necessarily extroverts; don’t seek or require the limelight; nor do they actually fit all those profiles you read.

Rarely do articles focus as much on Hsieh the person as this one does. In terms of analyzing what makes Tony tick, and why others have so much trouble implementing and sustaining his simple approach, this bit of insight seems to say it all.

Then he quietly slipped out from the party. Employees talked affectionately about him after he had gone. “Sometimes I look at him, and I say, ‘He is such a dork,’ ” said Lauren Glassman, a buyer in the action sports clothing division, downing a goblet of beer. “But at the end of the day, we are all dorks.”

Want more on introverted bosses? Check out this post by Douglas R. Conant, President and CEO of Campbell Soup.

Flickr image credit: http://www.flickr.com/photos/zedbee/103147140/