In honor of Saint Patrick’s Day, I borrowed four work-related, start-to-finish jokes from Irish Jokes.

Job Application
Paddy was filling out a job application. When he came to the question, “Have you ever been arrested?” he wrote, “No.”
The next question, intended for people who had answered in the affirmative to the previous question, was “Why?”
The applicant answered it anyway: “Never got caught.”

Job Interview
While being interviewed for a job, the personnel manager said to the Maguire brothers,
“We’re going to give you a written examination. Ten questions. Whoever gets most right we’ll hire.”
Papers were produced and the boys set to work answering the general knowledge questions. When the time was up the personnel manager collected and marked the papers.
“Well,” said he, “you’ve both got nine out of ten, but I’m giving Mick the job.”
“Why’s that?” asked Pat.
“Well,” said the manager, “you both got the same question wrong but he had
“I don’t know this” and you had “Neither do I!”"

Three Whiskey Reps
Three whiskey reps were seated in the restaurant waiting to have lunch with the prime minister and assorted international statesmen.
“Right,” said the Bells whisky rep, “let’s have a jar.” So saying he went to the bar and returned with three large Bells.
These were quickly supped and the Teachers’ rep said, I’ll get the same again.” He returned with three large Teachers and they were supped with equal speed. Finally, the Jamiesons rep went to the bar and returned with three large Bells.
“Bells? Bells?” said the other two in chorus. “Why didn’t you buy Jamiesons?”
“Well, you see,” said the Jamieson man, “it would hardly be polite to meet all those dignitaries smelling of strong drink!” (Ahh, the subtlety of a master salesman)

You’re Fired
“You on the scaffolding – you’re fired!” shouted the foreman from below.
“What did you say?” shouted Pat cupping his ear.
“You – get your cards – you’re fired!”
“Can’t hear you,” shouted Pat.
“I said you’re fired,” screamed the boss.
“What?” called Pat.
“Never mind,” muttered the foreman to himself. I’ll sack somebody else.”
“You do,” bellowed Pat, “and I’ll have the union on you!”

Irish or not, I wish you sunshine, shamrocks, and rainbows.

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This entry was posted on Friday, March 16th, 2007 at 10:20 am and is filed under Just For Fun. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed.
Tags: Saint Patrick's Day
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