I write a lot about the actions fostered by good MAP, how to evaluate your own MAP and how to modify/change it if you’re so inclined—but this only applies to output, what about input?
Now and then we all find ourselves dealing with %#@$&, better known as jerks or, to be truly polite, difficult people.
The Talmud says, “We do not see the world as it is. We see the world as we are.” Further, it’s often as we are that particular day, or even minute, and even as we change, minute to minute, so do others.
There’s lots of good information on identifying and dealing with jerks in the article; also, here are four of my favorite MAP attitudes that have helped myself and others over the years.
- Life happens, people react and act out, but that doesn’t mean you have to let their act in.
- Consider the source of the comment before considering the comment, then let its effect on you be in direct proportion to your respect for that source.
- Use mental imagery to defuse someone’s effect on you. This is especially useful against intimidation. Do it by having your mental image of the person be one that strips power symbols and adds amusement. (Give me a call if you want my favorite, it’s a bit too rude for a business blog, but has worked well for many people.)
And, finally, the one I hold uppermost in my mind
- At least some of “them” consider me a jerk—and at times they are probably correct.