Since it’s review time I thought I’d share the following excerpts taken from various annual reviews. Some are hearsay, others I know are real, because they were personally shared with me.

• Since my last report, this employee has reached rock bottom and has started to dig.
• I would not allow this employee to breed.
• This employee is not so much of a has-been, but more of a never-will-be.
• This employee opens her mouth only to change feet.
• He’s out of his depth in a parking lot puddle.
• She suffers from delusions of adequacy.
• He sets low goals and then consistently fails to achieve them.
• He doesn’t have ulcers, but he’s a carrier.
• He brings a lot of joy whenever he leaves the room.
• When his IQ reaches 50, he should sell.
• Donated her brain to science before she was done using it.
• If you give him a penny for his thoughts, you’d get change.
• If you stand close enough to him, you can hear the ocean.
• Needs both hands and feet to count past two.
• Her resume failed to mention her previous job: Cinderella’s wicked stepmother.
• If everything seems to be going well I know that she’s out of the office that day.
• The best position for this employee would be with one of our competitors.

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This entry was posted on Thursday, December 28th, 2006 at 3:46 pm and is filed under Communication, Just For Fun. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed.
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