Pretty much everybody has read articles and experienced “people chemistry,” that instantaneous reaction we have to a new person that makes us anxious to increase our interaction—or eliminate it all together. We don’t have this extreme reaction to everyone we meet, but when it does happen it has nothing to do with thinking—it’s strictly a deep, primal reaction.

The interesting thing I’ve found over the years is that a positive reaction can turn negative after additional exposure, but I have never seen negative chemistry turn positive.

Why is that?

Based on my experience, it’s because people with bad chemistry can’t “hear” each other. No matter what one says or does, the other will hear/see something totally different. No communication, no connection. Whereas, positive reactions turn negative when the person turns out not to be who/what we expected, but we learn this because we can “hear” them.

Illogically, we assume that if we have good chemistry with two people that they will have good chemistry with each other, but it doesn’t always work that way. Back when I was headhunting, Randy, a favorite client of mine, needed a general manager for a new division. I introduced him to Jim, one of my very favorite people. I had great chemistry with both and when they met they really hit it off. Wayne said that they were in such sync that they practically finished each other’s sentences; everyone else who was involved in the interviewing was high on Jim, so Randy arranged for his boss to fly in for dinner with himself and Jim. Randy considered it more of a courtesy, since he and his boss had great chemistry and he had always approved Randy’s choices.

(Bet you can see it coming.) Randy called me the morning after in total shock. He said he had never seen anything like it. From the time they shook hands it was as if they were speaking different languages. Afterwards, his boss said that Randy must have been nuts to think that Jim could do the job, let alone join their team.

When I spoke with Jim, he said that he couldn’t believe that a team led by Randy, of all people, had to put up with someone like that as boss. No way would he ever work around that guy.

As a manager, it’s hard to pass on a candidate with great skills, but if you, or one of the team, truly has bad chemistry with the candidate (or the candidate with one of the team) then you’re much better to take walk away, then to hire and hope things will change later.

This entry was posted on Tuesday, April 11th, 2006 at 10:26 pm and is filed under Business info, Communication, Hiring, Retention. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed.
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